Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the bar chart illustrated the proportion of men and women with various age groups do daily exercise in Australia in 2010

Overall, it is clear that people with the age of 45 to 54 have the highest participation in physical activities while men and women with 25 to 34 age have made up the smallest part in it whereas people with 65 or over age have moderate participation in these activities.

45 to 54 years old females covers the highest portion of daily activity around 53.3% which is marginally above than 35 to 44 years at 52.5% while the men's of both years have a lowest number of activity than women's about 43.1% and 39.5% respectively in addition young age people are also actively involve in exercise which experienced huge share of physical activity around 52.8% in men and 47.7 in women's this means young male's have more participation than older ones.

Australian women's and men's with the age of 65 and above have the moderate level of involvement which stood at 47.1 and 46.7% respectively whereas women's with 55 to 64 age group have experienced noticeable increase in physical activity which compare to youngers at 25 to 34 just have 48.9% while older males have a slightly more participation than youngers at 43.1% and 42.2% respectively

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by selecting and reporting several main features from the bar chart, such as the highest and lowest participation rates. However, the coverage is somewhat uneven and contains factual inaccuracies. For instance, the overview states that people aged 45 to 54 have the highest participation, which is true for females (53.3%), but the text confuses some trends when comparing age groups. Furthermore, the overall summary presents some ideas that are underdeveloped or inadequately supported, such as the vague mention of 'moderate participation' for those aged 65 and over without a clear contextual comparison. To reach a higher level, the response would need to ensure greater accuracy in reporting specific data points and present a more fully developed overview of the main trends across all categories without misinterpreting the demographic breakdown.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates some organization with basic paragraphing and an introductory overview. However, there is a lack of clear overall progression, and the logical flow is frequently disrupted by run-on sentences and inadequate referencing. Cohesive devices are used repetitively or mechanically, such as the frequent reliance on 'while' and 'whereas' to link long, clause-heavy sentences, making the relationships between ideas difficult to follow at times. For example, the third paragraph attempts to compress multiple comparisons into a single, breathless sentence without appropriate punctuation or transitional markers. To improve, the writer should use paragraph breaks more purposefully to separate distinct trends, ensure clearer referencing between pronouns and their subjects, and employ a wider range of cohesive devices more accurately to guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey basic information about the chart. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'proportion', 'participation', and 'noticeable increase', but these attempts are often marred by noticeable errors in word choice, form, and collocation. Examples include 'females covers the highest portion' (instead of 'account for' or 'represent'), 'men's of both years' (incorrect pluralisation and possessive form), and 'actively involve' (incorrect word form instead of 'involved'). Additionally, there are awkward phrasing choices like 'smallest part in it'. These errors can cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the response from achieving a higher band. To progress, the writer needs to expand their range of functional vocabulary for describing data and pay closer attention to word formation and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writing displays a very limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple clauses strung together with coordinating conjunctions or faulty attempts at complex sentences. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'the bar chart illustrated', 'females covers'), incorrect prepositions, missing articles (e.g., 'in young age people'), and severe punctuation errors, such as a complete lack of periods in the main body paragraphs, resulting in run-on sentences. These frequent errors cause considerable difficulty for the reader and obscure the intended meaning. To achieve a higher score, the writer must demonstrate better control over basic grammatical structures, use correct tense consistency, ensure agreement between subjects and verbs, and use punctuation correctly to demarcate individual sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.