Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The illustration gives information ratio of women and men in Austrailia of different age group doing regular physical activity in 2010.Overall, the number of men and women involved in physical avtivity male figure decreased with increasing age and women proportion rose and the end for 65 and over the same number of participant was equal.
It is quite evident from the bar graph during 15 to 24 age group the proportion of male was 52.8% and female was 47.7%. With the passage of time from 25 to 34 the figure for men decreased to 42.2% and for women 48.9%. During the age range 35 to 44 female population was increased and men population fall to its lowest digit in 39.5%.
Furthermore, the male and female population rose and it eatio showed th figure of 43.1 for men and 53.3 for women. People aged 55 to 64 men population went up 45.1 and women was 53%. At last the result was fantastic and both the participant involved in pysical activity was almost equal in proportion and thus for aged group 65 and over.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the main task by reporting data from the bar chart, and the minimum word count requirement has been met. However, the interpretation of trends contains notable inaccuracies. For instance, the text claims that the male figure 'decreased with increasing age', whereas the data actually shows male participation dropping initially in the younger age groups before rising again in the older brackets. The overview is also confusing and imprecise, stating that the female proportion 'rose and the end for 65 and over the same number of participant was equal'. Because some ideas are under-developed or inaccurately summarized, the response sits at a level where the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The text is organized into paragraphs, and there is a discernible attempt to present information logically, moving from an introductory overview into body paragraphs detailing specific age groups. However, the progression is hindered by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions such as 'It is quite evident from the bar graph' and 'Furthermore'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, particularly in the final paragraph where sentences feel disjointed and rushed. Cohesive devices are used, but they are sometimes repetitive or inaccurate, which prevents the writing from achieving a truly smooth and natural logical flow throughout.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and contains frequent spelling and word choice errors that impact communication. There are noticeable typos and erroneous terms, such as 'Austrailia', 'avtivity', 'eatio', and 'pysical'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'proportion' and 'participation', but control is weak, leading to unnatural collocations and inaccurate expressions like 'women population was increased' or 'men population fall to its lowest digit'. The range is minimally adequate for the task, but lexical shortcomings are apparent throughout the essay.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response features a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple or awkwardly constructed complex forms. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly regarding subject-verb agreement, missing articles, and awkward prepositional phrases. Examples include 'different age group' instead of 'groups', 'both the participant involved' instead of 'participants', and confusing clauses like 'for aged group 65 and over'. These errors occur regularly across the text and occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, though the core meaning of the data points can generally be deciphered despite the frequent slips.
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