Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
the chart illustrates the percentage of Australian male and female in different age groups who participated in regular physical activity in 2010.
The bar chart highlight the percentage of man with grey color in which lines are shown, as well as shows the percentage of woman with black color. Chart also gives the information about different age groups
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 2.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 3.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 2.5
The response falls significantly short of the minimum length requirement of 150 words, stopping at only 58 words. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed. The writer manages to introduce the topic by stating that the chart illustrates the percentage of Australian males and females in different age groups participating in physical activity in 2010. However, the attempt to describe the visual data is extremely limited and misses nearly all key features, trends, and comparisons. Instead of summarising the main data points from the bar chart, the second paragraph focuses on describing the chart's legend and visual formatting (e.g., 'percentage of man with grey color in which lines are shown'). To improve, the writer must write at least 150 words and provide a clear overview followed by detailed comparisons of the data trends.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5
The response is organized into two very brief paragraphs, but it lacks an overall progression or cohesive structure. There are no cohesive devices used to connect ideas, and the text stops abruptly before any meaningful body paragraphs can be developed. Referencing is basic, and the transition between the introductory sentence and the description of the visual elements is disjointed. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to expand the text into a logical sequence with a clear introduction, an overview, and well-organized body paragraphs supported by appropriate cohesive devices such as 'In contrast' or 'Overall'.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, featuring common words like 'percentage', 'chart', 'different', and 'age groups'. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as writing 'percentage of Australian male and female' instead of the plural forms 'males and females', and 'percentage of man' instead of 'men'. The description of the legend ('with grey color in which lines are shown') reflects a limited ability to discuss visual data accurately. To improve, the writer should use a wider range of precise vocabulary and learn standard phrases for describing charts, such as 'proportion', 'data', and 'demographic groups'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response relies on very basic sentence structures. There are noticeable grammatical and punctuation errors throughout the short text. For instance, the response begins with a lowercase letter ('the chart illustrates...'). Furthermore, there is an agreement error with 'percentage of Australian male and female', where plural nouns are needed. The second paragraph contains awkward phrasing ('The bar chart highlight...') where the verb-subject agreement is incorrect. To reach a higher band, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of sentence structures while maintaining grammatical accuracy, ensuring correct capitalization, subject-verb agreement, and pluralization.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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