Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given data illustrates the percentage of australian men and women in varying age brackets who did regular physical activity in year 2010

Overall, The graph showed great fluctuation throughout the age groups for both male and female. Notably after the age 24, females tended to exercise more than males.

Between age 15 and 24, more than 50% of the people who exercised were men . However, it dropped to 42.2% when it came to age bracket of 25 to 34. It further declined to 39.5 % for age from 35 to 44 however after 44, the percentage started to rise and by 65 or more , the percentage of male was 46.7%

From the age 15 to 24, only 47.7% were females. The percentage started to increase till the age bracket of 45 to 54 where it was 53.3% . However, it started to decrease again and for 55 to 64 and reached 47.1% for 65 and over

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main gender contrast and report several accurate figures, including the male peak of 52.8% among 15–24-year-olds, the male low of 39.5% at 35–44, and the female high of 53.3% at 45–54. The overview also notes that women generally had higher participation after age 24. However, some details are incomplete or unclear: the female figures for ages 25–34 and 35–44 are omitted, and the final sentence says the rate “started to decrease again” but does not clearly give the 55–64 figure of 53%. The overview’s claim of “great fluctuation” is also broad; describe the contrasting overall patterns more precisely. This covers the task with relevant data, but some features are less fully reported than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and separate descriptions of male and female trends. This makes the information easy to follow, and sequencing phrases such as “However,” “further declined,” and “after 44” help show changes over time. Some links are less precise, though. The repeated “However” creates a mechanical feel, and the final female trend is difficult to follow because the sentence moves from the peak to a decrease without clearly stating the 55–64 value before giving the 65-and-over figure. Use clearer transitions and make each comparison or change explicit. The organisation is coherent overall, but cohesion and referencing are not consistently smooth.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “percentage,” “age brackets,” “declined,” “increase,” and “decrease,” so the main trends are understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “The given data illustrates.” However, some choices are imprecise or unnatural: “great fluctuation” overstates the pattern, “people who exercised were men” confuses the share of men active with the gender composition of all exercisers, and “the percentage of male” is not idiomatic. Capitalisation and spacing are inconsistent, including “australian” and “39.5 %.” Aim for precise chart language such as “the proportion of men who exercised” and vary trend vocabulary without sacrificing accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex sentences, including clauses with “However” and time relationships such as “after the age 24.” Most of the meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors and punctuation problems reduce accuracy. For example, “after the age 24” needs an article or a different construction, and “for age from 35 to 44” is an awkward, incomplete pattern. In “for 55 to 64 and reached 47.1%,” the sentence lacks a clear subject and does not express the sequence accurately. There are also inconsistent capitals after commas and full stops, and spacing before punctuation. Check sentence boundaries and ensure each trend clause has a clear subject and verb.

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