Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The chart below illustrates the proportion of male and female of various age categories who daily did physical activity in Australia in 2010.

Overall, men from the youngest age group accounts for the largest share of physical activity performed and women from the age group of 45 to 54 devotes the major share of proportion. While, it is seen that the least workout is done by the males belonging from mid 30's to mid 40's respectivly.

Men from 15 to 24 years of age accounts the largest share of proportion of doing workout regularly at 52.8%, contrastingly females from the same age group are considerbly less fit as they are only at 47.7 while, ladies from 45 to 54 years of age have devoted the share of percentage by 53.3%. Moreover, both set of genders from the age category of 65 and above have almost the same percentage of 47.

From the youth age group(25 to 34) there is only a difference of only 6.7% respectivly in the daily workout timeless between male and females.Although, the percentage difference between male and female of the age 35-44 is huge. Women considerbly workout daily as the proportion is higher than man at 52.5%, while males, only holds the small share of percentage at 39.5 respectivly. Furthermore, 55 to 64 age bracket have man working out daily by 53.3% and women allocated almost 10% less than the males of the same age group.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main contrast: men have the highest rate in the youngest group, while women lead in most other age groups, and you include several relevant figures. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear. The 55–64 figures are reversed: men are at 45.1%, while women are at 53%, not the other way around. The claim that men aged 35–44 have the lowest rate is correct, but the overview would be stronger if it also stated that women exceed men in every group except 15–24. The description of the 25–34 difference as 6.7% is imprecise; it is a 6.7 percentage-point gap. Overall, the task is addressed, though some comparisons are less fully and accurately reported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs, and it moves broadly from younger to older age groups. This gives the reader a coherent overall arrangement. However, progression within the paragraphs is uneven: the second detail paragraph jumps between age groups and includes a reversed comparison for ages 55–64, which disrupts the account. Linking words such as “Moreover,” “Although” and “Furthermore” are used, but some connections are mechanical or do not clearly express the relationship between the figures. For example, “Although” introduces a contrast without a complete contrasting clause. Grouping the data consistently by age range and using clearer references to men and women would improve cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary, including “proportion,” “contrastingly,” “age bracket” and “allocated,” but several choices are unnatural or imprecise for describing chart data. Phrases such as “devotes the major share,” “share of proportion,” “less fit” and “workout timeless” make the comparisons harder to follow; the chart reports participation rates, not fitness or time spent exercising. There are also spelling errors, including “considerbly” and “respectivly.” Use straightforward, accurate terms such as “percentage,” “rate” and “participation,” and avoid repeating “share” when describing values. The range is sufficient to attempt the task, but more natural collocations and precise wording are needed for clearer reporting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and more complex forms, including clauses beginning with “While” and “Although,” so there is some structural variety. However, errors in agreement and sentence construction recur. For example, “men … accounts” should be “men … account,” and “females … are considerbly less fit as they are only at 47.7 while” lacks a clear sentence boundary and a complete comparison. In “the percentage difference … is huge,” the structure is understandable, but several long sentences combine multiple ideas with unclear punctuation. Articles and prepositions are also sometimes missing or awkward, as in “from mid 30’s to mid 40’s.” Shorter, carefully punctuated comparisons and consistent subject–verb agreement would make the meaning more reliable.

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