Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given bar graph illustrates the information of Australian, men and women who was grouped in different ages and involved in physical activities on daily bases.

Overall, it is clear that men was more active than women isn youngest age group, whereas, women were more physically active than men in all ages group except for the oldest one.In addition, the level of physical activity among women remain high and stable, whereas the figure of mean showed greater variation, with the lowest participation seen in the middle.

Majority, of women was involved in physical activity their percentage is almost from 47.1 to 53.3. The women who was in the age of 15 to24 year only 47.7 percent involved in physical activities, however these percentage was increase with the passage of time, like the women that was old 25 to 34 year there porportion is 48.9, but the women who was between 35 to 54 years they were highly involved in physical activity their rate is 52.5 to 53.5 which was the peak value in 2010. In the opposite only 47.1% wome were those who involved in age of 65 or over then.

In contrast, the younger men are more in physical activity as compare to other ages about there involving rate were 47.7. The men that were old from 25 to 64 there participant value is 42.2, 39.5, 43.1 and 45.1 respectively, however the oldest men their aged were 65 or over than 65 their peak value is 46.7.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main contrast: men have the higher figure in the youngest group, while women lead across the other age groups. You also note that women’s participation is relatively steady and that men’s rate reaches its low point in the middle age groups. However, the overview contains a factual error: women, not men, are more active in the oldest group (47.1% versus 46.7%). Some details are also inaccurate or unclear: the women aged 35–54 recorded 52.5% and 53.3%, not 53.5%, and the youngest men’s figure is 52.8%, not 47.7%. The report selects relevant data, but these misreadings and imprecise comparisons limit how fully it presents the chart.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an overview followed by separate discussion of women and men. This helps the reader follow the broad comparison, and linking phrases such as “Overall” and “In contrast” signal shifts between points. However, progression is sometimes weakened by unclear references and awkward transitions. For example, “these percentage” and “their proportion” do not clearly identify the figures being discussed, while “In the opposite” is not an effective link. The overview also says women lead in all groups except the oldest, then the final paragraph does not clearly reconcile this with the data. Organise each paragraph around a clear trend and use precise references to age groups and figures to make the comparisons easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing charts, including “percentage,” “participation,” “peak value,” and “variation.” These choices show an attempt to use task-specific language, but the range and control are limited, with repeated wording such as “involved in physical activity” and “value.” Several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, including “on daily bases,” “the figure of mean,” “their participant value,” and “in the opposite,” which can make the intended meaning difficult to interpret. Spelling and word-form errors such as “wome” and “proportion” misspelled as “porportion” also reduce precision. Build a more reliable set of collocations for describing rates and trends, and check spelling and word forms before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “whereas,” “however,” and “who,” but complex structures are often not controlled accurately. Errors in agreement and verb forms appear in phrases such as “men was,” “women remain,” and “these percentage was increase.” Articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent: “all ages group” and “oldest one.In addition” make the writing harder to read. Some sentences combine several ideas without clear grammatical links, particularly the long sentence beginning “The women who was in the age of 15 to24 year.” These recurring errors sometimes obscure relationships between the figures. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and build shorter, well-punctuated comparisons before adding subordinate clauses.

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