Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The bar graph illustrates the proportion of Australian male and female in various age groups who performed regular physical activity in 2010.

Overall, the proportion of adult male recorded the highest physical activity, whereas the share for regular activity fluctuated in other age groups. By contrast, the percentage of women doing excercise followed an upward trajectory until early sixties. Men and women aged 65 or over experienced almost similar share in activity.

The proportion of men aged 15 to 24 recorded 52.8% of regular excercise, which then decreased to 42.2% in age group 25 to 34. The share fell a further to 39.5% in 35 to 44 years old, before rising to 45.1% in 55 to 64 age group.

By contrast, the percentage of women doing regular activity was the greatest in age group 45 to 54, at 53.3%, followed by 55 to 64 years old, at 53%. As compared to men, women followed an upward trend in all age group, except in 15 to 24 years old, which accounted for 47.7% . Whereas, male and female between 65 and over recorded almost similar share of physical activity that is 46.7% and 47.1%, respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify several important features, including the male peak among 15–24-year-olds, the female high point at 45–54, and the near-equal figures for the oldest group. The figures you give for these comparisons are accurate. However, the overview is not fully reliable: “adult male recorded the highest physical activity” is unclear and overlooks that women have higher rates in most age groups. The description of women as rising until the early sixties also misses the slight fall from 53.3% to 53.0% and the subsequent drop to 47.1%. Some male data are omitted, including the recovery after the 35–44 low and the 65+ figure. A more precise overview and fuller coverage of the main trends would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and separate paragraphs describing the two sexes. This makes the information easy to locate, and linking phrases such as “Overall” and “By contrast” help signal relationships. However, progression within the data paragraphs is not always smooth. The male account jumps from the 35–44 group to 55–64, leaving the 45–54 figure unexplained, while the final paragraph combines the female trend with the oldest-group comparison. Some transitions are also mechanical or awkward, particularly “As compared to men” and the sentence beginning “Whereas”. Grouping the figures more systematically and using clearer links between comparisons would make cohesion more flexible and precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “proportion”, “fluctuated”, “upward trajectory” and “accounted for”, and the meaning is generally clear. There are, however, several inaccurate or unnatural choices that limit precision. “Adult male” and “share for regular activity” do not express the intended comparisons naturally, while “recorded” is awkward when describing a percentage. “Exercise” is misspelled twice, and “excercise” should be corrected. The repeated use of “share” and “proportion” also makes some descriptions less varied. Choose standard chart language and check spelling; for example, describe rates as “stood at” a figure or say that a group “had” a particular participation rate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex forms, including a relative clause in “which then decreased” and a contrast structure beginning “By contrast”. Most sentences remain understandable, but some grammatical errors and awkward constructions persist. In “the proportion of adult male recorded”, the noun phrase and verb do not agree naturally; “the percentage of women … was the greatest” also needs a clearer grammatical construction. The phrase “in all age group” requires a plural, and “male and female between 65 and over” has an incomplete age-group structure. The final “Whereas” clause is a fragment rather than a complete sentence. Review agreement, plural forms, and sentence boundaries, while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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