Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The provided bar chart presents the data of Australian men and women performing regular physical activities in percentage in year 2010. Along X-axis, is age group of men and women having physical activity and ,on Y-axis,is percentage. The light coloured line represents men and dark coloured line ,next to it, represents women.First is 15-24 age group men and women, having physical activity and their percentage is 52.8 and 47.7 respectively. Secondly, are men and women of 25 to 34 age group, having percentage of 42.2 and 48.9. At third, 35 to 44 age group men and women with percentage of 39.5 and 52.5. Next to it, is a age group of 45-54 of men and women with percentage of 43.1 and 53.3. Then comes, 55-64 age group having percentage of 45.1 and 53. At last is 65 and over age group whose percentage is 46.7 and 47.1 respectively for men and women.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You report the figures for all six age groups accurately, including the male and female percentages, so the reader can identify the data shown. However, the response mainly lists values rather than summarising the chart’s main features. It gives no clear overview of the overall pattern: men are more active only in the youngest group, while women lead in every other group; women’s rates peak around ages 45–64, whereas men’s lowest rate is among 35–44-year-olds. The opening description of the axes and colours does not replace this overview, and the chart uses bars rather than lines. To strengthen the response, select the most important comparisons and state the broad trends before giving supporting figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The figures are presented in age-group order, and sequencing phrases such as “Firstly,” “Next,” and “At last” help the reader follow the list. However, the response is essentially one long paragraph and has little progression beyond moving from one category to the next. It does not group the data into meaningful comparisons, such as the youngest group where men lead versus the remaining groups where women lead. Some transitions are awkward or repetitive, including “Next to it” and “Then comes.” Organise the response into a brief introduction, an overview, and one or two paragraphs comparing related figures. This would make the relationships between the data clearer rather than simply presenting each pair in sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary is sufficient to identify the chart’s subject and report percentages, with terms such as “age group,” “percentage,” and “respectively” used to convey the data. However, the range is limited and several expressions are repetitive or imprecise, particularly repeated references to people “having physical activity.” “Light coloured line” and “dark coloured line” also misidentify the chart’s bars and do not describe the legend clearly. Use more precise chart language and varied terms for participation and comparison. For example, “the proportion who exercised regularly” is more natural than “having physical activity,” while “bar” is the accurate term for the visual element. These changes would improve clarity and appropriateness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response communicates the figures using mostly simple sentence patterns, and the repeated “men and women” structure makes the comparisons understandable. However, the range is limited, and sentence construction and punctuation are often faulty. The opening contains awkward comma placement in “Along X-axis, is age group,” while “First is 15-24 age group men and women” lacks a clear grammatical structure. There are also article and agreement problems, as in “a age group,” and inconsistent spacing around commas. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and combine related figures using accurate comparative clauses. More controlled sentence patterns would make the information easier to read.

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