Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The information in the bar chart illustrates the percentage of men and women of different age groups in Australia involved in regular physical activities.

Looking at the data it is clearly visible that females in most age groups were more involved in the physical activities compared to males. The highest percentage was of females aging from 45 to 54 with a percentage of 54 percent, followed by females aging from 55 to 64 with 53 percent, then the females from age group of 25 to 34 with a figure of 48.9 percent.

The only age group in which males were more involved in physical activities was 15 to 24 at 52.8 percent and in the age group of 65 and over both genders were almost equally doing physical activities.

Overall the female’s percentage increased with the age and peaked at 53.3 percent where as the percentage of male’s peaked in the younger age group at 52.8 percent and started decreasing gradually.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main comparison accurately: women recorded higher participation in most age groups, while men led among 15–24-year-olds, and the oldest group was nearly level. You also report several relevant figures, including 52.8% for young men and 53.3% for women aged 45–54. However, the overview is not fully precise: female participation did not rise steadily with age, since it was lower at 25–34 than at 15–24, and it peaked at 45–54 before easing slightly. The male trend is also described as decreasing gradually, although it rises after the 35–44 low. Include the key turning points and compare the sexes across the middle age groups to make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear overall progression: an introduction is followed by comparisons and a concluding overview. The sequence of female figures in the second paragraph is easy to follow, and phrases such as “followed by” and “The only age group” help connect the information. The final paragraph also signals a summary with “Overall.” To strengthen the organisation, separate the overview more clearly from the detailed comparisons and group the data by trend—for example, describe the male decline and recovery together, then contrast this with the female rise and slight fall. Some links are a little mechanical, and the final overview repeats points already made rather than adding a sharper synthesis.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for describing the chart, with relevant terms such as “percentage,” “age group,” “peaked,” and “involved.” The meaning remains clear throughout. However, several phrases are imprecise or unnatural for formal data reporting: “females aging from” is better expressed as “women aged,” and “the highest percentage was of females” is an awkward construction. “Doing physical activities” is also repeated and less precise than “participating in regular physical activity.” Aim for accurate collocations and a more varied set of reporting verbs, such as “stood at,” “recorded,” and “rose.” These refinements would make the description more fluent and precise without changing its clear basic meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, and most of the comparisons are understandable. For example, the sentence beginning “The only age group in which males were more involved” successfully uses a relative clause. Some grammatical errors remain, however. In “females aging from 45 to 54,” the age phrase is not formed correctly; use “women aged 45 to 54.” The possessive forms in “the female’s percentage” and “male’s peaked” are also inappropriate for these general comparisons. In “where as,” the connector should be written as one word, “whereas.” Review sentence punctuation and possessive constructions, and use consistent plural or non-count forms when referring to women and men. These changes would improve accuracy while preserving your range of structures.

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