Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The bar chart illustrate the percentages of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Overall,there are 6 different types of age groups of male and female whom involved in regular physical activity. every age group had a different percentage going as the same till 65 and over. There are 52.8 percent of males and 47.7 percent of female at the group 15 to 24,but 25 to 34 age group had a few low percentage like 42 and 48 percent,as the group ages increased the physical activities in male and female become reduced 35 to 44 and 45 to 54 remain on the same percentage with a few little difference. Surprisingly, 55 to 64 age groups increase gradually and stood upto 45 percent in male and 53 percent in female.the last age group were 65 and in this group male and female remain on same position.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the chart’s subject and include some accurate figures, such as 52.8% for men and 47.7% for women aged 15–24, and roughly 42% and 49% for the next group. However, the response only minimally summarises the main features: the overview does not identify the key pattern that men lead only in the youngest group, while women have higher rates in every other group. Some comparisons are inaccurate or unclear: activity does not simply decrease as age rises, and the 35–44 and 45–54 groups do not remain at the same percentages. The final group’s figures are also not the same. The response is 137 words, below the required 150, and 16 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Add a clear overview and report the main trends accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a basic sequence: an introduction, an attempted overview, and a paragraph describing age groups. This gives the reader some sense of the chart’s progression. However, ideas are not arranged coherently enough to make the comparisons easy to follow. The overview sentence, “every age group had a different percentage going as the same till 65 and over,” is difficult to interpret, and the later account moves between age groups without clearly distinguishing the trends for men and women. Linking phrases such as “but,” “as,” and “surprisingly” are used, but they do not consistently show the intended relationships. Use separate, clearly focused paragraphs and organise comparisons around the main pattern—for example, the youngest group versus the older groups—rather than presenting a confusing sequence of figures.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough basic chart-related vocabulary to communicate the topic, including “percentages,” “age groups,” “increase gradually,” and “reduced.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear. For example, “6 different types of age groups” is not a natural way to describe the categories, and “stood upto” and “remain on same position” are imprecise. Repetition of “group” and “percentage” also limits variety. Choose accurate terms for describing data, such as “category,” “rate,” “rose,” and “declined,” and use comparison language such as “higher than” or “peaked at.” This would make the account clearer and more appropriate to an academic chart summary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and joined sentences, including a comparison beginning “There are 52.8 percent of males … but…”. However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. The opening needs subject–verb agreement (“The bar chart illustrates”), while “whom involved” uses an incorrect relative pronoun and verb form. There are also problems with articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, as in “the last age group were 65 and in this group male and female remain on same position.” Commas and spacing are inconsistent, and several clauses are joined without clear punctuation. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses using “while” or “whereas.”

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