Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The Australian women did more physical activities than men in the age of 15 to 24 means they physicaly more fit and srong than men in the age between 25 to34 men are more active than women they did more physical work .in the age between 35 to 44 men are more strong than women and did more physical work in the age between 45 to 54 men did more physical work same as in the age batween 55 to 64 and over 65 that means that women did more physical just during thier teen ages after that their physical work much reduces as compared to men men did more physical work in his life and is more strong and physicaliy fit than women due some personal reasons the women is not much physicaly active as compared to men mens are strong enough than women they have have more patience.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response attempts to compare activity levels across age groups, but it misreports the chart’s central pattern. It says women were more active only in their “teen ages” and that men were more active from 25 onwards; in fact, women recorded higher figures in every group from 25–34 through 65 and over, while men led only among 15–24-year-olds. The claims that men were “more strong” and that women’s activity fell for personal reasons are unsupported explanations, not information shown by the chart. There is no clear, accurate overview of the main trends or reliable selection of key figures. To improve, state the overall gender pattern first, then compare the high and low points using accurate percentages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The response follows the age groups in roughly chronological order, which gives it a basic sequence, and it attempts to make comparisons between men and women. However, it is presented as one long, largely unpunctuated passage, so the reader has difficulty separating the age-group comparisons from the concluding generalisations. Repeated transitions such as “in the age between” do not create clear progression, and references such as “that means” introduce conclusions that are not supported by the chart. Organise the report into a short overview and one or two comparison paragraphs. Use clear linking expressions such as “by contrast” and “whereas,” and make each sentence report a specific, accurate comparison.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “physical activities,” “active,” “age,” and “compared,” so the general subject can be understood. However, vocabulary is repetitive and often imprecise for describing statistical data: “did more physical work” is repeated instead of using terms such as “had a higher participation rate” or “were more physically active.” Several expressions are unsuitable or unsupported, including “more strong,” “more patience,” and “physical work,” which do not accurately describe the chart’s measure. Spelling errors such as “physicaly,” “srong,” and “batween” also reduce control. Build a focused vocabulary set for reporting percentages and trends, and check spelling and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example, “in the age between 35 to 44 men are more strong than women,” but sentence boundaries and grammatical relationships are often unclear. There are recurring problems with agreement and sentence construction, as in “the women is not much physicaly active,” and the opening phrase “The Australian women did more physical activities than men in the age of 15 to 24 means” does not form a clear sentence. Punctuation is also largely absent, creating run-on sentences. Use shorter, complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and practise comparative structures such as “women were more active than men in the 35–44 group.”

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