Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the given pictorila graph illustrats about the proportion of mens and female in Australia doing regular physical activity in the different age groups in the year 2010 . it represented in the form of persentage .

overall, it is evident that the female in the age group of 45 to 54 had dominated over that year. while the male in the age group of 35 44 had the lowest figures .

at first , the age group of 15 to 24 had the male figures of 52.8 %. whereas the female was only 47.7% . further the age groups of 25 to 34 and 35 to 44 were 42.2% , 48.9%, 39.5 %, 52.5% in the year of 2010 respectively .

how ever the 45 to 54 was 43.1% in male and 53.3 in female in year 2010 . In addition the age groups of 55 to 64 and 65 and over the 65 were 45.1% , 53% , 46.7% , 47.1% , in male the female respectively .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the chart’s subject and include figures for all six age groups, with most values reported accurately. The overview also notes that women’s activity was highest around ages 45–54 and that men’s lowest rate was among 35–44-year-olds. However, the overview is limited: it does not clearly state the main overall pattern that women exceeded men in every group except 15–24. The figures for the 25–34 and 35–44 groups are also difficult to follow because four values are compressed into one sentence without clearly matching each value to its sex and age group. Make the key comparisons explicit and organise the data so the reader can readily see the trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, an overview and two paragraphs of details. This gives the information some organisation, and sequencing phrases such as “at first,” “whereas” and “in addition” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, progression is not consistently clear. In the sentence listing the 25–34 and 35–44 figures, the reader must work out which percentages belong to which group and sex. The final sentence has the same problem, with the values and labels in an unclear order. Use one sentence per pair of age groups, or a consistent male-then-female pattern, and use linking words to express comparisons rather than simply adding details.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “proportion,” “age groups,” “figures” and “percentage,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “pictorila graph,” “had dominated over that year” and “lowest figures.” Spelling errors, including “illustrats,” “persentage” and “how ever,” are noticeable and reduce the accuracy of the presentation. Aim for precise, conventional language for describing charts: for example, say that a rate “was higher” or “was the lowest,” and refer to “men and women” or “male and female rates” consistently. Proofreading spelling and avoiding awkward expressions would make your descriptions clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast with “whereas” and an overview clause beginning “while.” However, grammatical control is uneven, and errors sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to understand. For example, “the age groups of 25 to 34 and 35 to 44 were 42.2%, 48.9%, 39.5%, 52.5%” lacks a clear grammatical structure linking each figure to its subject. In “the age groups of 55 to 64 and 65 and over the 65 were…,” the sentence structure breaks down. There are also issues with articles, agreement and punctuation, such as “the female was only 47.7%.” Build shorter, complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, then check punctuation and agreement.

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