Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The bar graph below compares the ratio of males and females of different ages who did regular physical activities in 2010, in Australia.

Overall, it can be clearly seen that women participated more than men in the physical activities although older male and females both had almost same proportion of physical activities that were 65 or more than 65 years old.

Firstly, in the young adults boys had the the proportion of 52.28%, while girls had 47.7%. Adults in their late twenties and thirties constitute 42.2% and 48.9% male and female respectively. Ladies had the highest ratio of 52.5% in the physical activities from the age group of 35 to 44.

Secondly, in the middle aged adults female had a share of 53.3%, whereas male had 43.1%. Older adults male had the fraction of of 45.1% and female had 53%. Those aged 65 and above had the figure of 46.7% and 47.1% for males and females respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main comparison—that women were more active than men in most age groups—and report figures across all six groups. The overview also notes that the oldest group had similar rates, which is a useful key feature. Most figures are accurately represented, although the youngest male figure is given as 52.28% rather than 52.8%. The overview is somewhat broad: women did not lead in every group, since men had the higher rate among 15–24-year-olds. Also, the description of the 25–34 and 35–44 groups is less clear than the later comparisons, and the peak female rate of 53.3% at ages 45–54 could be highlighted. A more precise overview and clearer selection of the main highs and lows would strengthen the report.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs presenting the figures in age-group order. The sequencing from younger to older groups makes the information easy to follow, and contrast markers such as “while” and “whereas” help compare the sexes. However, the paragraph divisions and signposting are somewhat mechanical: “Firstly” and “Secondly” do not explain the grouping, and the first detail paragraph combines several age ranges without a clear comparison pattern. Some references are also unclear, particularly “Adults in their late twenties and thirties,” which covers two separate chart categories. Grouping the figures into younger and older age ranges and using explicit references to each age band would make progression and cohesion more controlled.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing chart data, including “participated,” “proportion,” “share,” and “figure,” and the reader can generally understand the comparisons. There are also attempts at more formal wording, such as “middle aged adults.” However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for this task: “ratio” and “fraction” are not the best terms for percentages, “young adults boys” is awkward, and “Ladies” is too informal and inconsistent with “female.” Repetition of “had” and “physical activities” also limits flexibility. Prefer precise chart language such as “percentage,” “rate,” and “participation,” and use consistent labels such as “men” and “women.” This would improve naturalness and precision while retaining the relevant range already shown.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and some more complex comparisons, for example, “whereas male had 43.1%” and the overview clause beginning “although.” The intended meaning is usually clear, but some grammatical errors remain. In “women participated more than men … although older male and females both had almost same proportion,” the noun forms and article use are not controlled; “the age group of 35 to 44” also sits awkwardly within its sentence. There are duplicated words in “had the the proportion” and “fraction of of,” and the opening sentence has an unclear construction around “males and females of different ages.” Aim for complete, parallel comparison structures and check articles, plurals, and repeated words. More consistently accurate complex sentences would improve control.

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