Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The bar graph illustrates the information about the percentage of men and women with different age groups who lived in Australia and did regular physical exercise in 2010.
Overall it is apparent that the female were significantly doing better in almost every age groups, specially who under 55 to 64 year of age. In contrast men received a highest proportion around 52.8, while other categories were considerably under the 50 percentage of total number.
Looking at the details, 52.8% of men aged 15-24 exercised regularly, compared with women who represented 47.7%. However, the figure was men declined to 42.2% among those aged 25-34 and reached at lowest point of 39.5% in the 35-44 age group.
In contrast, the percentage of women significantly increased from 48.9% among 25-35 to 52.5% in the 35-44 group. It the peaked at 53.3% for women aged 45-54 before falling slightly to 53% among those aged 55-64. In the oldest age group, the figure was almost equal, at 46,7% for men and 47.1% for women.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
You identify the main contrast—that women recorded higher activity in most age groups—and support it with several accurate figures, including the male low of 39.5% at ages 35–44 and the female peak of 53.3% at ages 45–54. The final comparison for the oldest group is also accurate. This gives the response a relevant overview and clear coverage of key data. However, the overview is partly unclear: “specially who under 55 to 64 year of age” does not clearly state the age range, and “men received a highest proportion around 52.8” overlooks that men’s rate later rises from its low. The 45–54 male figure and the female rate for ages 15–24 are not discussed. A more precise overview and fuller comparison across the age groups would strengthen the report.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two detail paragraphs. The progression from the youngest group to the middle age groups and then the oldest group is generally easy to follow. Linking phrases such as “Overall,” “However,” and “In contrast” help signal comparisons, and the figures are mostly grouped sensibly by sex and age. Some cohesion is less controlled, though. “In contrast” is repeated where the relationship is not always a direct contrast, and the overview’s phrase “specially who under 55 to 64 year of age” makes the reference unclear. The shift from male figures to female figures could also be signposted more consistently. Use clearer age-group references and vary linking devices to make the progression more precise.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing a chart, including “percentage,” “declined,” “lowest point,” “increased,” “peaked,” and “falling slightly.” These choices help communicate the main trends, and the meaning is generally recoverable. Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, however: “female were significantly doing better” and “men received a highest proportion” do not fit formal data description, while “percentage of total number” is imprecise. “Specially” is also not the appropriate form in this context. Aim for standard chart-reporting expressions such as “the proportion of women was higher” and “the figure for men reached a peak.” More precise vocabulary would improve clarity and formality without requiring more elaborate wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including comparisons with “compared with” and clauses introduced by “while” and “before.” Most of the data remains understandable, but some grammatical errors are noticeable. For example, “the female were” has an agreement problem, and “the figure was men declined” combines incompatible sentence structures. “It the peaked” is also faulty, while “among 25-35” omits the age-group wording needed for a complete comparison. There are further issues with articles and number agreement in “a highest proportion” and “almost every age groups.” These errors do not usually prevent understanding, but they limit accuracy. Check subject–verb agreement and make sure each sentence has a complete, consistent clause structure.
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