Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The bar chart below indicat that the paercentage of Austrailian men and women in different age of phycal exersize in 2010.

The bar chart shows that in 15 to 24 ages man who doing exersize apromexly 52.8 parsent on the other hand women doing 47.7 persent . Wiche can indicate the man doing exersize more than women . In the age of 25 to 34 man are goin to do exersize 42.2 parsent wich is lower than 15 to 24 ages men. In the same ages women contineu thair exersize 48.9 persent wich is increase 15 to 24 ages women . The age of 45 to 54 man having thair exersize 43.1 percent that is more than lower to 35 to 44 ages man and the sane ages woman are having exersize 53.3 parsent wiche can show women continue exersize are continiously increase . But the ages of older man losoin thair exersize andi it,s going down.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the chart’s subject and make some relevant comparisons, including that men lead in the youngest group and women have higher participation in the 25–34 and 45–54 groups. However, the report covers only a few age groups and does not give a clear overview of the main pattern across all six groups. Some details are inaccurate or unclear: women’s participation rises to 53.3% at 45–54, then is 53% at 55–64 and falls to 47.1% among those aged 65 and over; the claim that older men’s activity is “going down” overlooks the rise from 39.5% at 35–44 to 46.7% in the oldest group. Select the key trends and compare them accurately throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic sequence through the age groups, and linking phrases such as “on the other hand” and “In the same ages” show an attempt to connect comparisons. However, the response is presented as one long paragraph, with no distinct overview to guide the reader. Several sentences run together or contain unclear references, particularly the sentence beginning “The age of 45 to 54 man…” and the final comment about older men. Repeated use of “the same ages” and “which can indicate” also makes the progression mechanical. Organise the report into an introduction, a concise overview, and paragraphs comparing the figures, using clear references to each age group.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “percentage,” “age,” and “increase,” so the chart’s general subject can be understood. However, vocabulary is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling errors make the report difficult to read: examples include “paercentage,” “Austrailian,” “phycal,” and “exersize.” Some expressions are also imprecise or unnatural, such as “man who doing exersize” and “continue exercise are continiously increase.” Use accurate chart language and vary it with terms such as “participation rate,” “higher than,” “rose,” and “declined.” Check spelling carefully, especially for repeated key words.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example by using “on the other hand” and “that is more than…,” and the reader can recover some intended comparisons. However, sentence structures are limited and many clauses are not grammatically complete or well controlled. Examples include “man who doing exersize” and “women contineu thair exersize,” where verb forms and sentence construction are faulty. Agreement and article use are also inconsistent, as in “The age of 45 to 54 man.” Punctuation is unreliable, with long sentences joined without clear boundaries. Practise accurate simple comparison sentences first, then combine them using clauses such as “while” and “whereas.”

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