Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

the bar chart illustrate the two genders in Australia who engaged in physical acti vity from different age grand in 2010.

overall,male had interest more than female at early stage of life,and at young and older adult age,female becomes more activity in physical activity compare to male,while during elderly,the percentage of male and female involved in exercise almost becomes the same.

Initially, the male had 52.8 within the age 15-24years have more interest in physical activity than female which account for 47.7.while towards the age between 25 to 34,the female becames higher than male which grow to 48.7% and the male 42.2.within the age 34 to 44,the womale pump up to 52.5 while the male decreased further to 39.5.

furthermore,within 44 to 54 and 55 to 65 the woman maintain a steady proportion which was 53.3 and 52 and men were below 40%.conversely towards 65 and above,there is a little elevation in the interest of exercise which male was 47.1 % and women becomes 47.6

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main comparison: men lead in the youngest group, while women are more active across most other age groups, and the figures converge among people aged 65 and over. You also include several relevant values, such as 52.8% and 47.7% for the youngest group and 39.5% for men aged 35–44. However, some figures and descriptions are inaccurate: women aged 25–34 are at 48.9%, not 48.7%; men are 43.1% and 45.1% in the 45–54 and 55–64 groups, so they are not below 40%; and the final figures are 46.7% for men and 47.1% for women. The overview is relevant, but these errors and some unclear age ranges limit its precision.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an overview followed by details for the age groups, and sequencing expressions such as “Initially,” “furthermore,” and “conversely” help guide the reader. The comparisons are generally presented in chart order. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and punctuation makes the progression harder to follow: for example, “47.7.while towards” runs two ideas together. Some references are unclear, particularly “during elderly” and “within 44 to 54 and 55 to 65,” which also makes it difficult to track the age categories. Use separate, clearly punctuated sentences and consistent age-group labels, and organise the body into clearer comparisons between men and women.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “physical activity,” “proportion,” “decreased,” and “elevation,” and the reader can usually understand the intended comparisons. However, the range is limited by repeated or imprecise expressions such as “interest” for participation and “more activity in physical activity.” Several word-choice, spelling, and form errors reduce accuracy, including “age grand,” “womale,” and “pump up.” Some phrases, such as “male had interest more than female,” are unnatural and make the meaning less immediate. Aim for precise chart language—“participation rate,” “higher proportion,” “rose,” and “declined”—and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including comparisons linked with “while” and “which,” and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, errors in sentence structure and agreement occur across the response. For example, “the bar chart illustrate” needs subject–verb agreement, while “the male had 52.8 within the age 15-24years have more interest” combines clauses without a clear grammatical structure. Tense and agreement are also inconsistent in “female becomes more activity” and “women becomes.” Punctuation is often missing after full stops and commas, creating run-on sentences. Build shorter, complete sentences first, then add controlled comparison clauses, checking verb forms and sentence boundaries.

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