Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The bar chart compare physical activity between Australian man and women in the different age groups in 2010. which data show in 2010 older people are quit low physical activity as comparatively younger people.

Overall at the age of 15 man are wide range of involves in physical activities. while women are comparatively man are particularly good in physical activity these are 24 to at the age of 53 consistently increased in 2010. man at the age of 25 its quit decreasing 52.8 to 42 percent and women are 47.7 to 48.9 a small increase. noticeable in man at the age 35 to 45 on this age 39.5 to 43.1 a minor grow which is good. on the other side women are 52.5 to 53.3 a small climb. in the last old man are in not major change physical activity man are 45.1 to 46.7 a small surge but Female small decrease note in percentage 53 to 47.1. this is detailed overview of bar chart of man or Female physical activity in Australia in 2010

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the chart’s subject and report several relevant figures, including the male decline from 52.8% among 15–24-year-olds to 39.5% among those aged 35–44, followed by a rise, and the female increase to 53.3% among 45–54-year-olds. However, the overview is unclear and includes an unsupported claim that older people had “quite low” activity: female rates remain around 47–53% across the age groups. The response also does not clearly state the main comparison—that men lead only in the youngest group, while women have higher rates in every other group. Some figures and trends are difficult to follow because age ranges are confused. A clearer overview and accurate, selective comparisons would make the report more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is an attempt to organise the response, beginning with an introduction and then discussing age groups, and phrases such as “on the other side” signal comparison. However, the ideas do not progress clearly: the overview is mixed with details, and the long second paragraph moves between male and female figures without a consistent structure. Some links are inaccurate or unclear, as in “women are comparatively man are particularly good,” while repeated references to “in 2010” and “small increase” make the account feel repetitive. Separate the overview from the details, then group the figures by age range or by sex, using clear comparison markers such as “whereas” and “by contrast.” This would give the information a more logical progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “percentage,” “physical activity,” “decreasing,” and “increase,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning difficult to interpret. For example, “wide range of involves in physical activities” does not clearly describe a high participation rate, and “a minor grow” is not a natural way to report a rise. “Quit low” appears to mean “quite low,” but the claim itself is also imprecise. Repeated use of “small” and “man” limits precision. Build a set of accurate trend expressions—such as “fell,” “recovered,” “remained stable,” and “participation rate”—and check that each phrase fits the data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to combine ideas, but sentence structures are often incomplete or faulty, and errors frequently make relationships between figures hard to understand. The opening, “The bar chart compare … which data show,” has subject–verb agreement problems and an unclear clause. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also unreliable: “Overall at the age of 15 man are wide range…” runs into “while women…” without a clear grammatical structure. There are recurring problems with articles, plurals, and verb forms, as in “man are” and “women are 47.7 to 48.9 a small increase.” Practise writing short, complete comparison sentences first, then combine them with accurate clauses using “while” or “whereas.”

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