Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The bar graph illustrates the percentages of Australian men and women who participated in regular physical activity across six different ages-groups in 2010.

Overall, it is clear that men were more physically active than women in the youngest age group, while women had highest participation rate in all remaning age group.

To begin with, according to men the highest proportion of physical activity was recorded among those aged 15 to 24, at 52.8%. However, this percentage dropped signficantly to 42.2% in the 25 to 34 aged group. It continued to fell and reached its the lowest point 39.5% in thr 35 to 44 aged group. after that rate of participation showed gradually increased to 43.1% for those aged 45 to 54 and 45.1% among the 55 to 64 aged group. The percentage increased slightly to 46.7% for men aged 65 and over.

However, regarding females, the proportiom was relatively lower than males in youngest age group, starting at 47.7%. In constrat, it increased to 48.9% among those aged 25 to 43 and rose continue to 52.5% in the 35-44 aged group. The figure reached its highest point of 53.3% among those aged 45 to 54, before decreasing slightly to 53 for among those aged 55 to 64. In the oldest age group, the percentage fell noticeably to 47.1 %.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You give a clear overview of the main comparison: men lead only in the 15–24 group, while women have higher activity rates in every older group. The detailed figures for men are accurate, and the female figures and overall rise to a peak followed by a decline are also reported clearly. This addresses the task and supports the overview with relevant data. One factual slip is the reference to women aged “25 to 43”; the chart shows 25–34. The overview could be more informative by highlighting the contrasting patterns: men’s rate falls to a low at 35–44 and then recovers, whereas women’s rate rises to a peak at 45–54 before falling. These refinements would make the selection of key features more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised into a brief introduction, an overview, and separate paragraphs for men and women, giving the information a clear progression. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “after that,” and “before decreasing” help readers follow the changes across age groups. The comparison between the sexes is also easy to track because each group is discussed in turn. However, some transitions are awkward or repetitive: “However” begins both the male discussion and the female discussion, although the second use mainly signals a change of topic. The long data descriptions would be easier to read with more consistent sentence boundaries and punctuation. Use transitions that express the actual relationship, such as “By contrast,” and keep the age-group comparisons parallel.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “proportion,” “participation rate,” “recorded,” “dropped,” and “reached its highest point.” These choices allow you to describe both comparisons and trends, and the meaning is generally clear. There are, however, several spelling errors, including “signficantly,” “remaning,” “proportiom,” and “constrat,” as well as inaccurate or awkward expressions such as “ages-groups” and “rose continue.” These errors limit the precision and naturalness of the vocabulary, even though they do not prevent understanding. Aim to check spelling carefully and use standard chart language consistently, for example “age groups,” “increased steadily,” and “the proportion of women.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex sentences, including clauses with “while,” “before,” and “although,” and you use past-tense reporting appropriate to the 2010 data. However, some grammatical errors recur and make parts of the description less controlled. Examples include “women had highest participation rate,” which needs articles, and “It continued to fell,” where the verb form is incorrect. In “reached its the lowest point,” the determiner is duplicated, while “after that rate of participation showed gradually increased” has an unclear and faulty verb structure. Sentence-initial capitalization and punctuation are also inconsistent. Review articles, verb patterns, and sentence boundaries; accurate versions such as “the rate continued to fall” and “after that, participation gradually increased” would improve control.

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