Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The bar chart illustrates men and women of australia of several age group involved in physical activity in 2010.

Overall, the physical activity done by women is rised in almost all the age groups with the exception of youger age women and above 65 .the physical activity is measured in percentage.

Among all the age men age between 15 to 24 show the highest percentage as compare to other age group of men ,while women show at inclined in the physical activty at the age of 45 to 54 with the percentage of 53.3 .furthermore,women have lowest percentage of 47.7 at the age of 15 to 24 but at the ages of 25 to 34 the women takes the lead as compare to men at the percentage of 48.9 and the was decline of activity of men that is 42.2 percentage .

As we depicts,the physical activity after 65 and over of both men and women where constant and stable as compare with other age groups.AT 55 to 64 the women have 53 and men have 45.1 percentage of activity respectively.At35 to 44 age of men shows the lowerest percentage in physical avtivity

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify several relevant features, including the male peak among 15–24-year-olds, the female peak at 45–54, and the lowest male figure at 35–44. You also include some accurate comparisons, such as women’s 53% versus men’s 45.1% among 55–64-year-olds. However, the overview is unclear and partly inaccurate: women’s activity does not rise in almost all age groups, since it falls from 53% to 47.1% in the oldest group, and the youngest women are not an exception to a rise across the earlier groups. The claim that activity for both sexes is “constant and stable” after 65 is also unsupported. A clearer overview of the contrasting overall trends, followed by more precise comparisons, would make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic overall structure: an introduction, an attempted overview, and paragraphs of comparisons. This helps the reader recognise that you are describing the chart. However, progression within the body is difficult to follow because several age groups and comparisons are crowded into long sentences. For example, the sentence beginning “Among all the age men…” moves from the male peak to the female peak, then to the female low and the 25–34 comparison without clear separation. Linking words such as “furthermore” and “as we depicts” are sometimes awkward or do not clarify the relationship between points. Organise the data by sex or by age-group pattern, and use shorter sentences with clear comparisons and references.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “percentage,” “age group,” “highest,” “lowest,” and “decline,” so the reader can generally identify the subject of each comparison. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning unclear. Phrases such as “women show at inclined,” “the women takes the lead,” and “physical activity done by women is rised” do not express the intended trends naturally. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “youger,” “activty,” and “lowerest.” Use precise chart language such as “the proportion increased,” “women recorded the highest rate,” and “the figure fell,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine information using clauses and comparisons, for example with “while” and “as compare to,” but the sentence structures are often faulty and the range remains limited. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in “is rised,” “women takes,” and “as we depicts.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation also cause difficulty: the overview runs into “.the,” and the final section joins several statements without consistent spacing or full stops. These problems sometimes make relationships between figures hard to follow. Practise accurate simple comparison sentences first, then build longer sentences with controlled clauses—for example, “Women’s rate peaked at 53.3% among 45–54-year-olds, whereas men’s was 43.1%.”

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