Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given bar chart exhibit the information about the percentage of austrailian men and women in different age groups who did physical activity in 2010.

The highest percentage occupied by the age group from 45 to 54 years. On contrary, the lowest proportion has been recorded for over 65 years old people.

It has observed that four age groups have the almost same percentages i-e 15 to 24, 35 to 44, 55 to 64 and 45 to 54 years.

The over 65 years men and women has equal percentages in 2010.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify the chart’s subject and attempt to report comparisons, but the response covers the data only minimally and contains important inaccuracies. The highest figure is for women aged 45–54 (53.3%), while the lowest is for men aged 35–44 (39.5%); neither is correctly described. The claim that men and women aged 65 and over have equal percentages is also inaccurate (46.7% and 47.1%). The four groups you call “almost the same” do not form a clear comparison, and there is no reliable overview of the main gender pattern. The response is 82 words, below the required 150; the 9 words copied from the prompt are excluded. Include an accurate overview and select key figures to support it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic sequence: an introduction is followed by several observations, so the reader can recognise the intended chart summary. However, the ideas do not build into a clear overview and supporting details. For example, the statement about four age groups having “almost same percentages” is difficult to connect to the preceding claims, and it does not explain whether the figures refer to men, women, or both. “On contrary” signals a contrast, but the comparison that follows is not accurate. Use a clearer structure: introduce the chart, summarise the overall pattern, then compare the sexes across age groups with selected figures. Linking phrases should clarify relationships rather than simply announce them.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “percentage,” “age groups,” “proportion,” and “recorded,” and the general topic remains understandable. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “percentage occupied by” is not a natural way to describe a chart value, and “people” is too broad when the chart distinguishes men and women. There is also a spelling error in “austrailian.” Aim for standard chart language and accurate collocations. For example, describe a figure as “the highest percentage was recorded among…” and refer specifically to “men aged 65 and over” or “women aged 65 and over.” This will make comparisons clearer and more appropriate for an academic summary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You produce several short sentences, and their basic meaning is generally recoverable, but grammatical control is uneven. In “The highest percentage occupied by the age group,” the sentence lacks a finite verb; write, for example, “The highest percentage was recorded among…”. “It has observed” also needs a passive construction (“It has been observed”), while “The over 65 years men and women has equal percentages” has problems with word order and subject–verb agreement. The response relies almost entirely on simple sentence patterns, so it shows little range. Practise accurate comparative structures and clauses, such as “Although women recorded higher rates in most age groups, men had the highest figure among 15–24-year-olds.”

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