Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

there has been considerable debate about whether the result of the scientific information is better to be shared freely or to keep some of them. while some people believe that is good to share this result to the public. other argued that important and the too valuable information must kept in secrit. this essay will examine both prespectives before concluding that a balanced approach is the most benefical.

on the one hand, those who support the benefical of making scientific research accesaible to the public argue that it help individuls to be conscious about what happning in the world in each filed. this is mainly because the reserch and new technology develop so fast nowadays so peopls will konw about all the trends and adapt their life with it because it's mainly used to facilitate individual's lives. as a result, people are more exciting to this develpment and aware of any dangeur. for example, with the fast develpment in the healthcare field people are now know that many of harmful diseases before having a tretment nowadays.

on the other hand, supporters of the importance of make some information

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You introduce the topic and state a position—“a balanced approach is the most beneficial”—and the first body paragraph gives a relevant reason for sharing research: it can help people understand developments and potential dangers. However, the response addresses the task only partially. The opposing view is merely introduced in the unfinished phrase “supporters of the importance of make some information,” with no explanation or example, and your own balanced position is not developed. The healthcare example is also unclear and does not fully show how public access helps. The response is below the required minimum length, which contributes to the limited development. To improve, explain both sides, support each with a specific example, and show what information should or should not be shared.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some organisation: an introductory paragraph is followed by a paragraph beginning “on the one hand,” and you signal the opposing view with “on the other hand.” These markers help readers recognise the intended structure. However, the essay stops before the second side is explained, so there is no complete progression toward the promised conclusion. Within the first body paragraph, several ideas—public awareness, rapid technological change, adaptation, excitement and danger—are placed together without clear links or sufficient explanation. Some connections are also difficult to follow, particularly the final healthcare example. Complete each paragraph around one main point, explain how the example supports it, and finish with a conclusion that returns to your stated balanced position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “scientific research,” “new technology,” “trends,” “healthcare field” and “diseases,” and phrases such as “balanced approach” show an effort to express an evaluative position. However, the range is limited and frequent spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand: “accesaible,” “prespectives,” “benefical,” “secrit” and “dangeur.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “share this result to the public” and “more exciting to this development.” Aim to learn accurate topic collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, use “make research accessible to the public” and “become more aware of developments” rather than translating phrases word by word.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast clause beginning “while” and a reason introduced by “because.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction, verb forms, agreement and articles frequently affect clarity. For example, “it help individuls” needs a singular verb, while “people are now know” combines incompatible verb forms. The opening also has sentence-boundary and capitalisation problems: “while some people…” should be connected appropriately or begin as a complete sentence with a capital letter. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses. Proofread each sentence for a clear subject, a correctly formed verb and appropriate punctuation.

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