Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In today's evolving world, exchange of information is crucial in different aspects of life. While some people argue that information should be shared openly in scientific research,commercial and eductation sector, others advocate the confidentiality of some facts due to their significance. In my opinion,data should be transferred openly with others so that they can also benefit from it.

One school of thoughts holds that knowledge about different fields should be provided freely. To some extent, it is a good thing. Sharing credentials about scientific experiments, trade and academic world allows people to extebd their way of thinking and to make various researches. Such researches help them in thheir developnment and can result in new innovations.The insights that are shared might play a key role in the completion of many projects. As a result, people become successsful. For example, in educational institutes , teachers should provide the students with all kinds of details

While others think that some details should be kept hidden because of their importance. However, most people do not share any facts with others due to di

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You introduce both perspectives and state a clear preference for open sharing: “data should be transferred openly.” You also give a relevant reason, linking shared research to new innovations. However, the response addresses the task only partially: the case for protecting valuable information is introduced but not explained, and the essay ends mid-sentence at “due to di”. Your example about teachers providing details is also unfinished and does not clearly support the wider discussion of research and business. The response is 71 words below the required minimum, which leaves too little space to develop both views and your opinion. To improve, explain a specific reason for confidentiality, such as protecting commercial inventions, then support your position with a complete example and conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an identifiable opening and an attempt to organise the discussion into separate paragraphs, with “One school of thoughts” and “While others” signalling contrasting views. This gives the reader some sense of the intended structure. However, ideas are not arranged coherently overall because the second viewpoint stops abruptly and there is no conclusion to complete the progression. Within the first body paragraph, the links from sharing information to research, development, innovation and success are asserted rather than clearly connected. The example about teachers is left unfinished. Build a complete paragraph for each view, use clear links between claim, explanation and example, and finish with a concluding paragraph that restates your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “scientific experiments,” “confidentiality,” “innovations” and “insights,” which helps establish the subject. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “play a key role.” However, the range is limited and some choices are inaccurate or awkward, including “sharing credentials” where “sharing findings” would fit the meaning, and “extend their way of thinking.” Several spelling errors—“eductation,” “extebd,” “thheir,” “developnment” and “successsful”—are noticeable and can distract the reader. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and proofread carefully. More precise terms such as “research findings,” “intellectual property” and “commercial advantage” would help you discuss both openness and confidentiality.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including the contrast structure “While some people argue…, others advocate…” and the result clause “so that they can also benefit from it.” These show some ability to connect ideas grammatically. However, control is uneven: punctuation is missing after commas in “research,commercial” and “In my opinion,data,” and the sentence beginning “For example” is incomplete. The final sentence is also cut off, so its structure cannot be completed. There are awkward constructions such as “allows people to… and to make various researches,” where the parallel phrasing and countable noun form need attention. Practise complete sentences, parallel structures and comma spacing, then check that every paragraph ends with a finished thought.

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