Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people claim that it is brilliant idea to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. While, others argue that some information should be protected. But I personally believe that most information should be shared for the sake of the society, but sensitive or commercially valuable information should be protected. This essay will discuss both views before explaining my opinion.

in this modern era lots of breakthroughs are taking the parts associated with the research. In researches, several significant information should be flew over the organization, as the assistant to other researcher. As a result, this culture in organization can lead to other essential discoveries. For example, if there is smooth flow of necessary information then the corporation between the staff then it is sure to get done the other and important discoveries. Consequently, all the society and the individuals will be benefited.

However, others tend to argue that raising question mark on; is this compulsory to share all the confidential information? All most all the organization has their own competitive strategy to outperform the competitors, sharing of this kind of sensitive information could cause the misuse of the information. For instance, if the intellectual property of the company share freely this might cause the misuse of the property such as patent, logo and so on.

I personally believe that most information must be shared for the sake of society and the customers of the product, but the sensitive information must be protected appropriately. If there is smooth flow of information in society then it is regarded as responsibility towards the society and trust can gain from the customer. But the flow of sensitive information cause misuse and sometimes the organization might face the bankruptcy issues.

In conclusion however the large number of people are on the view of sharing information freely. I chose to believe on sharing information on the basis of merits and demerits.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the benefits of sharing information and the necessity of protecting sensitive data. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the explanation of how sharing information leads to 'other and important discoveries' is vague and lacks concrete, real-world examples. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your arguments with more specific illustrations, such as mentioning open-source software or specific scientific collaborations, rather than relying on general statements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'However', 'For example', and 'In conclusion', to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. For instance, the sentence 'in this modern era lots of breakthroughs are taking the parts associated with the research' is unclear and disrupts the logical progression. Additionally, some referencing is slightly confusing, such as the use of 'the other and important discoveries'. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on somewhat repetitive or imprecise phrasing, such as 'significant information should be flew over' (incorrect collocation) and 'get done the other and important discoveries'. There are also instances of word-choice errors, such as 'the corporation between the staff' (likely meaning 'cooperation'). To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and precise terminology related to business and research, such as 'intellectual property', 'proprietary data', or 'collaborative innovation'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'it is brilliant idea' (missing article), 'sharing of this kind of sensitive information could cause the misuse' (awkward phrasing), and 'I chose to believe on sharing' (incorrect preposition). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly the use of semicolons and commas. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and correct article usage.

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