Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
A few men think that it is the right path to discuss the instructions with both scientific research and business. On the other hand, a few people say that some information is so important that it cannot be shared with anyone. In this essay, we will discuss the two sides of information: some can be shared with anyone, while others are important and cannot be discussed with others.
On the one hand, some people have knowledge that can be shared to work together faster, like the knowledge of science and business. In this way, man are becoming successful in his life, for example, the Chinese nation works together to become a developed country in the world. They realized that their people are their real power.to share the scientific information with the other to completed the project early, for example, TO talk about COVID the scientists share information with other people to make the vaccine.
ON the other hand, a few cost people say that some information is important that cannot be shared freely. The reason is that some secret to be kept from the local people about drugs being used in the wrong way. for example, the person to be know how to make the atomic bomb to be used the wrong way.
In my opinion both have the same advantages mostly to be share the information with your class; following it is the right way to gain knowledge. The other way is that some talk is important that cannot be shared with a person whose personality is like an enemy.
In this essay, I will suggest you that information should be shared with other people; the advantage is that you can gain knowledge and the important information cannot be shared.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the task. However, the development of ideas is limited and often repetitive. For instance, the explanation regarding the Chinese nation is vague and does not clearly link to the prompt's focus on scientific and business information sharing. The arguments regarding atomic bombs and drug misuse are mentioned but lack depth or logical expansion. To improve, you should focus on providing more specific, well-reasoned examples that directly support your claims, ensuring that each paragraph contributes meaningfully to the overall discussion rather than restating the same points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are used, but the transitions between sentences within paragraphs are frequently disjointed. For example, the sentence 'to share the scientific information with the other to completed the project early' lacks a clear connection to the previous clause. Referencing is also inconsistent, making the flow of ideas feel somewhat fragmented. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring clear logical progression between sentences would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary range is limited and often repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'information', 'shared', and 'important'. There are also instances of awkward word choices, such as 'a few cost people' and 'the person to be know'. These errors occasionally make the meaning unclear. While you attempt to discuss complex topics like scientific research and global development, the lack of precise terminology restricts your ability to express ideas fluently. To reach a higher band, you should work on expanding your vocabulary to include more academic collocations and synonyms, and focus on using words in their correct grammatical context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'man are becoming'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'to completed the project'), and missing articles or prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences ending abruptly or lacking proper structure. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors indicates a lack of control over complex grammatical forms. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like tense consistency and pluralisation will help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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