Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
some people believe that to share more information is good for scientific research , business and academic world, on the otherhand others believe that some information are too important to share. from induvisual concern both statement are logically correct. in my opinion i agree with the 1st group who belive to share more and more information for research and academic perpouse .
For scientific research , business and academic purpose its significant that provide more date to get more accurate result insteate of giving some data. rafter analysing data researcher invent new innovation or improve existing one while Businessman can identify which path is essestial to imrove for his business as well. For example researcher research on customer data and findout the best selling product for different ages client which will be helpfull for besiness.researcher never ask any sensetive data for research
On the otherhand , many people believe that some information are vital to share.they are concern about their personal data such as bank account no, bank balance, credit card data ect . this is also a noticeable concern to worry about cause nowadays many unethical group hack bank balance by getting this type of sensetive data. for example after getting financial data hacker can hack bank account which one is burden for them, thats why the prefer not to share all information to all.
in conclusion , both of these two group members concern is valid from their own point of view. Furthermore academic research is inovate novelity for future and they strictly keep data secret. i belive to share less sensetive data for new innovation.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding business data is underdeveloped, and the example provided is quite vague. While the prompt asks for a discussion of scientific, business, and academic contexts, the response focuses heavily on general data security rather than the nuances of open-access research or intellectual property. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific, well-supported examples that clearly distinguish between the benefits of transparency and the risks of data exposure in these professional fields.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'on the otherhand' and 'in conclusion' are used, but the internal flow between sentences is frequently disjointed. There is a lack of variety in linking words, and some transitions are abrupt. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult to track the logical progression of the argument. Improving the use of transition signals and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'data' and 'information'. There are several spelling errors, including 'induvisual', 'perpouse', 'insteate', 'essestial', and 'inovate'. Some word choices are imprecise, such as 'researcher research on customer data' or 'burden for them'. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of precision and the high frequency of spelling mistakes hinder the overall quality of the response. Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic collocations and focusing on accurate spelling will help you achieve a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some information are'), missing articles, and incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'its significant that provide'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with spaces missing before commas and periods. While the meaning is usually understandable, the high density of errors in basic grammar structures prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, before attempting more complex grammatical structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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