Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There is a ongoing debate about sharing information to others. Many individuals believe that we need to share every possible data in academic, business and scientific innovations. On the other hand, individuals thinks that confidential details should not be shared freely with others. Both perspective have its own merits that we will discuss in this essay.

To begin with, every details have its own importance. Some data should be shared with academic and scientic researchers in order to maintain healthy soceity. For example, all COVID-19 related records were shared with the health sector of distinct country and scientists. From which they inform respective citizens to stay alerts and how to minimize the risk of infection. This will help individuals life and well-being. Some important data or possible change that can be made in educational system should be shared with academic institutes to enhace education of the future generation.

On the other hand, some confidential data of the public and other business should not be shared with others. For example, apple has find new software or new model for their new launch and it would be beneficial to them, if this kind of confidential data get leaked then their benefit get decreased and other businesses will get profit from their valuable research. Furthermore, personal data of citizens should not get revealed because it has more confidantial details which can be used against them and it is not safe for the citizens. Many organization can missuse this information in order to get profits.

To conclude everything, i think that some important health related information should be openly shared with the individuals. While, personal details of public and business should not be shared openly to protrct individual's right.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the COVID-19 example for open sharing and the Apple example for intellectual property. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat basic. For instance, the discussion on personal data is a bit brief and could have been expanded with more depth regarding the balance between privacy and security. The position is consistent throughout, but the essay would benefit from more sophisticated argumentation to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore', which help the reader follow the argument. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and there are instances where the flow between sentences could be smoother. For example, the concluding paragraph is slightly abrupt. The use of referencing is generally clear, though some minor errors in pronoun agreement (e.g., 'Both perspective have its own merits') slightly affect the overall cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'confidential details', 'intellectual property' (implied), and 'health sector'. However, there are several spelling errors ('scientic', 'soceity', 'enhace', 'confidantial', 'protrct') and some awkward word choices, such as 'every possible data' (data is uncountable) and 'apple has find' (incorrect verb form). These errors do not impede communication but prevent the essay from reaching a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('individuals thinks', 'every details have') and article usage. Verb tense consistency is also an issue, such as 'apple has find' instead of 'has found'. While the writer attempts complex sentences, the frequency of these errors is noticeable. To improve, the student should focus on basic grammatical accuracy, specifically pluralization and verb forms, before attempting more complex structures.

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