Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
A certain group of people think that sharing maximum information in scientific research, business and academic world is a good thing because it can enhance our information and knowledge. Whereas others say privacy about some sensitive information is too important because it can be resulting in a financial or other kind of loss. This essay is in favour of the later school of thought due to private security is our priority.
Some people argue that, sharing all the information regarding employment or academic field is a good thing. Oversharing can expand the knowledge or increase the level of someone's information but it could be harmful if the listener is a scammer or cheater. To give an example, according to a public survey it is proved that peoples who shared the whole details about their personal or professional things, were scammed or did not achieved the goal.
On the other hand, it is said that there are some information which are very important and sensitive that could not be shared freely in public. Oversharing of important details can be result as a failure in academic records or some kind of financial loss in business. To quote an instance, the survey was conducted by the business faculties, it is proved that who kept the sensitive data safe they achieved the goal.
To conclude, although personal information sharing can damage goal or result in losses, this essay is in favour of keeping some private information as a secret for future success or to get benefits from the field wherever it belongs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
You have addressed both sides of the argument and provided a clear personal opinion. However, the development of your ideas is somewhat limited. The examples provided, such as the 'public survey' and 'business faculties' study, are vague and lack specific detail, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. To improve, ensure that your supporting points are more thoroughly explained and grounded in concrete, realistic scenarios rather than generic references to surveys. Your position is consistent throughout, but the depth of analysis needs to be increased to fully satisfy the requirements of the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression from the introduction to the conclusion. You use basic cohesive devices like 'On the other hand' and 'To conclude' to link your ideas. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally repetitive. To improve, try to vary your linking words and ensure that the transition between your supporting points and your examples is smoother. The overall structure is functional and easy to follow, which meets the requirements for a band 6.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for a higher score. You rely on basic terms like 'good thing', 'important', and 'things', which are repetitive. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'enhance our information' and 'result as a failure'. To improve, focus on using more academic and precise vocabulary. For example, instead of 'good thing', use 'advantageous' or 'beneficial'. Expanding your range of synonyms and learning how to use them in the correct context will significantly boost your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of your writing. Examples include 'peoples who shared' (should be 'people'), 'did not achieved' (should be 'did not achieve'), and 'there are some information' (should be 'there is some information'). These errors in subject-verb agreement and verb tense are noticeable. To improve, focus on proofreading your work for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly with pluralisation and verb forms. Increasing your control over these fundamental structures will help you achieve a higher band score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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