Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
A group of peer ponder that it is good to keep private information as possible in scientific research , business and the academic world but others say it should be shared freely . Both the views will be discussed in the forthcoming paragraphs before coming to logical conclusion .
on the one hand , firstly the information should share freely because its helps a individual or groups to speed up their progress by searching some inventions or medicines . furthermore , it asset everyone to learn a new things that coming in trend as well as its improve their intellectual developments and character traits . moreover its also helps people by doing any teamwork like making any automobile , robots and so on .
On the other hand , sharing not much information to the people helps in several ways like protect our secrets and data from rivals . To exemplify , a company making any cold drinks that famous by their recipe and research and it do not wants to other companies make the same beverage to stand front of it . In addition to it they also wants to safe their data from leaks and danger . moreover data from national security that government not sharing the blueprint of any weapons or missiles that invent by their hardwork . and that is they do not share to much information .
to conclude that , in my opinion information should spread in the forms of facts and studies but hide dangerous and private secrets .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the arguments regarding scientific progress and corporate secrets are introduced but lack depth or sophisticated examples. The explanation of why national security data should be kept private is a relevant point, but the expression is hindered by grammatical errors. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand on your points with more detailed reasoning and more specific, real-world examples rather than general statements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'on the one hand', 'furthermore', and 'to conclude', which is positive. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as the transition 'in addition to it they also wants to safe their data'. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring they are used in a more natural, sophisticated way will improve your score in this area.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is quite limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'good', 'information', and 'things'. There are also some noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'searching some inventions' (instead of 'developing' or 'researching') and 'stand front of it' (instead of 'compete with it'). To improve, you should focus on learning more precise academic vocabulary and collocations related to research, business, and security, and try to avoid repeating the same words throughout the essay.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('it asset everyone', 'government not sharing', 'they also wants to safe'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the placement of commas and the use of articles. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be highly beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.