Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Some people think that it is often seen better to share information about scientific research, business and also acedemic world. While other believe that few information contain valuable facts to share openly.
This eassy will discuss both of points of views as well as personal opinion
Firstly it is often seen that whenever someone get khownlege about anything like acedemic education or scientific research so he try to share or discuss it with others which is a good habit because it will let more people to Khow and understand about these topics as everyone can't afford university or any institute to get these information so sharing with others is a better choice as there is a quote that sharing is caring
On the opposite side some people think that we should not share these information with others so I believe that it's because that there is some technical things in these topics which can led some side effects for example if someone miss use it again something or someone
In the conclusion I think both of points has his own drawback and benefits. I think both is good
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 188 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the essay attempts to address both sides of the argument, the discussion is superficial and lacks the necessary depth or specific examples required for a higher band. The position is stated but not consistently maintained or fully supported throughout the text. To improve, you must expand your arguments with detailed explanations and concrete examples, ensuring you meet the length requirement to allow for a thorough exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the progression of ideas is limited due to the brevity of the text. Cohesive devices are used in a very basic and repetitive manner, such as 'Firstly' and 'On the opposite side'. There are also issues with referencing; for example, 'these information' is grammatically incorrect and creates confusion regarding what is being referred to. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that your sentences flow logically from one to the next, rather than relying on simple transitions.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary range is quite limited and repetitive. There are frequent spelling errors, such as 'acedemic', 'eassy', 'khownlege', and 'Khow'. Additionally, word choice is often imprecise, such as 'few information' instead of 'some information' or 'technical things' instead of 'sensitive data' or 'proprietary information'. The lack of sophisticated vocabulary prevents the essay from demonstrating the range required for higher bands. You should focus on learning the correct spelling of common academic terms and expanding your vocabulary to include more precise, topic-specific terminology.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Examples include 'whenever someone get khownlege', 'he try to share', and 'both of points has his own drawback'. Subject-verb agreement and pluralisation errors are consistent throughout the text. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, which limits the grammatical range. To improve, practice using a mix of simple and complex sentences, and pay close attention to basic grammar rules such as verb conjugation and the use of articles.
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