Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

These days, there has been a lot of talk about sharing information. This essay will delve deeper into the punitive reasons, viewpoints, overviews, and advantages causing this scenario before presenting my school of thought in the ensuing paragraphs with sufficient and relevant examples.

At first glance, there are several reasons in support of my context, but the most obvious one is that many scientific research can solve many day to day life and health problem. If some researches have been done on the disease than by knowing how it spread we can save ourselves. For example, one survey conducted by "The Daily News" revealed that In business, sharing information can improve cooperation and create better products.

My point is further supported by that Students can also benefit because they can access more academic research and resources. This is because by sharing information about academic world students have many path for their carriers and future options. Therefore, free access to information can promote progress and innovation in society.

On the other hand, Some information contains valuable ideas that require years of research and investment. Companies may keep important information secret to protect their products and remain competitive.

Scientists may also need to protect their research until they have completed their experiments. Sharing sensitive information freely could lead to misuse or financial losses. Therefore, certain information should only be shared with trusted people or under specific conditions.

To recapitulate, it may be argued that, even though there are many causes, overviews, viewpoints, arguments, pros as well as negative of sharing information. Lastly, it seems to me that it is a wide idea to use such options, and they are pragmatic as well for a human being on Earth. In order to foster global wealth, productivity, and a fine environment, citizens are urged to abide by the relevant laws and regulations.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding scientific research is vague, and the example provided is not fully integrated or explained. The conclusion is also quite weak, as it uses filler phrases like 'punitive reasons' and 'overviews' that do not actually contribute to the task. To improve, you should focus on expanding your arguments with more specific, logical explanations rather than listing general concepts. Your position is clear, but it lacks the depth required for a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused. Phrases like 'At first glance' and 'My point is further supported by that' feel forced or grammatically awkward. Additionally, the introduction and conclusion contain a list of abstract nouns ('punitive reasons, viewpoints, overviews') that do not logically connect to the content of the essay. While there is a logical progression of ideas, the transitions between sentences and paragraphs need to be more natural and precise to achieve a higher score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and sophistication. You rely on repetitive or slightly inaccurate word choices, such as 'punitive reasons' (which is contextually incorrect here) and 'wide idea'. There is an attempt to use academic vocabulary, but it is often forced or misused. To reach a higher band, you should focus on using collocations more accurately and incorporating a wider range of topic-specific vocabulary related to research, intellectual property, and business ethics, rather than relying on generic fillers.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'many scientific research can solve' (subject-verb agreement), 'If some researches have been done on the disease than' (incorrect conjunction and pluralization), and 'students have many path for their carriers' (spelling and pluralization). While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and pluralization errors.

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