Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some argue that sharing as abdundant information in Scientific research , business and the academic world is good and on the other hand, some oppose this believe and contend that sharing too much information loses it its importance and valuable to be shared openly for research and other purposes. This essay provides both views and i believe that information is data and can be used for teh benefit of the people and future geneartion.

It is understandable that people hesitate to share personal information to third party who are unknown to them. the data can be misused and abused for other purposes. However, this should be provided to trusted and government funded organisation who manage the information in more secure manner. for instance , if a person provides his contact and personal information to a telcom company, they should not sell these infromation to third party for small un reliable companies, such as real estate and housing companies who are always in need of new clients. this is breach of customer trust.

On the other hand, if a survey is conducted to take valuable information from the people, the trusted company should be transparent with their purpose and intention. They should provided proper documents mentioning the use of these data. Data privacy must be maintained. these data can be used for scientic research , business prediction and change the future of education.

I conclude by mentioning my opinion ,people should provided information provided that data privacy must be maintain and the organsation taking these information must be transparent with the intention so people can decided whether or not to provide their information.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You present a position—that information can benefit people and future generations—and include points about privacy, misuse, and transparency. The example of a telecom company selling customer details is relevant and helps explain why some information should be protected. However, the response only partially addresses the specific debate: it focuses mainly on personal data and privacy rather than explaining why scientific, business, or academic information might be valuable to share freely, or why research findings and commercial knowledge may be too valuable to disclose. Your own opinion is present but not fully developed. To strengthen the response, discuss both views directly in these fields and support each with a specific example. The required length is met; eight words copied from the prompt were not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “On the other hand” and “I conclude” signal stages of the argument, and the telecom example is placed in a relevant paragraph. However, progression between the ideas is not always clear: the first body paragraph moves from personal information to government-funded organisations, while the next shifts to surveys without clearly connecting these points to the task’s debate about sharing research, business, and academic information. Some linking is also mechanical, and references such as “these data” are not always clear. Organise the body around the two opposing views, then use the conclusion to state which view you support and why.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “data privacy,” “third party,” “transparent,” and “scientific research,” which helps communicate the general subject. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “breach of customer trust.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make parts less clear, including “sharing as abundant information,” “valuable to be shared openly,” and “small unreliable companies.” Repeated use of “information” and “data” also limits flexibility. Aim for more precise language connected to the prompt, such as “share research findings,” “protect commercially sensitive information,” and “make knowledge publicly accessible.” Proofreading spelling and choosing natural word combinations would make your meaning easier to follow.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a conditional structure in “if a person provides his contact and personal information…” and a relative clause describing housing companies. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence structure, verb forms, agreement, articles, and punctuation sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “They should provided proper documents” needs a correctly formed verb, while “people can decided” also has an incorrect verb form. The opening sentence is especially difficult to process because it combines several ideas without clear grammatical boundaries. Use shorter, complete sentences when presenting complex points, and check subject–verb agreement, verb forms after modal verbs, and sentence punctuation.

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