Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people consider that it would be a great option to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business ideas and academic world. However, most of the people believe that some information must be personal or important or valuable to be shared freely. In addition, before giving my opinion this essay will examine both viewpoints. I believe that its necessary to share some information nevertheless, it depends on its boundry; if its too personal or private so it should not be shared freely.

One major factor, is that sharing information in scientific research or academic world can be understandable however, business ideas or something related to this must be shared according to its boundry level. As an example if scientists are researching on a virus like how it spreads, what it effects to our body, what types of medicine c an be crucial option for that and more like; if sharing information for this types of stuff can be beneficial along with that, it can make research less difficult. In addition, sharing information in academicly is also beneficial. For instance, if teachers are teaching the same subject in diffrent schools however, if they know more about the topic and can gain more knowledge about that topic and than teach to their students can be beneficial for both teachers and students too. I believe that this type of information can be shared freely.

On the other hand, some personal, private or valuable information should not be shared freely as compared to other information. As an example if a person owns a business than its pretty obvious that he should not share information like his net revenue, where he stores commercial good of his business along with that, where and how to enter that place where he saves his savings for business and more like that. it would be shared freely if he shares about business ideas, how to grow business from zero and more like that

To conclude, many people consider that its necessary to share as much as possible information. In addition, most of the people believe that some important or valuable information should not be shared. However, from my perspective I would say it depends on the boundry of the information.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a clear overall position: information should be shared, but not when it is too private or valuable. The examples about virus research and teachers exchanging knowledge are relevant and help explain the benefits of openness. You also illustrate the case for protecting business information with examples such as revenue and storage locations. However, the discussion is uneven: the benefits of sharing are explained more fully, while the opposing view is mainly a list of sensitive details, with little explanation of why protecting them matters or where the boundary should lie. Develop that reasoning and make your distinction between shareable business ideas and confidential business data more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion that restates your position. This makes the overall line of argument easy to follow. You use linking expressions such as “On the other hand,” “In addition,” and “To conclude,” although some are repetitive or do not show the relationship between ideas precisely. For example, the long virus example combines several points in one sentence, and the business paragraph shifts from confidential information to shareable ideas without a clear transition. Use shorter, more focused sentences and clearer referencing, and organise each body paragraph around one main claim followed by its explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main ideas, and terms such as “scientific research,” “commercial,” “revenue,” and “valuable information” suit the topic. However, the range is limited by repeated general words and phrases, including “information,” “beneficial,” and “more like that.” Several choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “boundry level,” “what it effects to our body,” and “sharing information in academicly.” Spelling errors such as “diffrent” and “boundry” also reduce precision. Build a more exact set of topic-related expressions and check word forms and collocations so that your meaning is consistently clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures and clauses introduced by “if” and “however.” The main ideas are generally understandable, but control is inconsistent, especially in longer sentences. For example, “if teachers are teaching the same subject in diffrent schools however, if they know more…” contains a confusing clause structure, while “it would be shared freely if he shares about business ideas” has an unclear subject and conditional relationship. There are also errors with articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, as in “its necessary” and the run-on business example beginning “As an example.” Practise building complex sentences around one clear main clause, and check punctuation and possessive forms.

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