Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-19
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Some people have perspective of sharing all the information they have in scientific research, business and the academic world whereas the others argue not to share significant or crucial information freely. I believe people should spread information that is necessary for a good purpose even that is valuable for them beacuase too much information may not highlight the point of focus.
Many people share all the information they have on some topic that might be relevant but most of the information seems to be meaningless and just put stress in organising that data in scientific research.For instance, if a person is collecting data on number of people workin in admisteration and if the whole hospital staff data was given to him that puts him in stress of finding the correct data.
I believe people should spread the information that would be helpful and essential either it is important or valuable for them. For example, if we take the same above example of person collecting data for hospital administeration staff he should be taking only data from people working in that department that will make his work easy and less time taking. The people working there would give him most appropriate and authentic information that he might need.
In conclusion, I believe that people should give the information that is essential not every bit of information that is unnecessary. If the information that is valuable to be shared in scientific research, people should share it without being reluctant to it. This approach will make scientific research, businessess and academic world more updated and authentic to relp on.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You give a clear view that information should be shared when it is useful, and the hospital-data example helps illustrate why relevant information matters. However, the response only partly discusses the two positions in the prompt. The case for sharing as much information as possible is not explained in its own right, and the opposing view about information being valuable or sensitive is mostly reduced to the idea that excess data creates work. Your examples also repeat the same hospital scenario, so the reasoning remains limited and under-developed. To strengthen the response, explain a distinct benefit of open sharing, such as enabling researchers to verify findings, then develop a specific reason some information may need protection, such as commercial confidentiality or patient privacy. The stated length requirement is met.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. The hospital example gives the body paragraphs a shared focus, and phrases such as “For instance” and “In conclusion” signal relationships between sections. However, progression is limited because both body paragraphs return to essentially the same example, and the first paragraph does not clearly develop one side of the debate before the next shifts to your own view. Some references are also unclear, including “the same above example” and “that might be relevant.” Use separate paragraphs to explain each viewpoint, then connect them to your position. More precise referencing and a wider range of linking expressions would make the argument easier to follow and less repetitive.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “scientific research,” “authentic information,” “valuable,” and “essential,” so the main subject is understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or awkward, which sometimes makes the intended meaning less clear. For example, “people have perspective of sharing” is not a natural way to describe a viewpoint, while “puts stress in organising that data” and “less time taking” are imprecise collocations. Spelling errors such as “beacuase,” “workin,” “admisteration,” and “relp” also reduce accuracy. Build a bank of precise terms for both sides of the topic, such as “open access,” “confidential data,” and “intellectual property,” and check spelling and collocations during revision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast introduced by “whereas” and conditional structures such as “if we take the same above example.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms recur. For example, “if a person is collecting data on number of people workin” needs a clearer clause structure, and “if the whole hospital staff data was given to him” has problems with article use and agreement. The opening sentence also lacks an article in “have perspective.” Some long sentences combine several ideas without clear punctuation, making them harder to process. Practise accurate relative clauses and conditional sentences, and divide complex explanations into shorter, well-punctuated units.
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