Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the globalization world of advancement, the topic of share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world is became an higly controversial.First i will discuss the both sides and will give my own opinion at the end.

I strongly agreed with both statements and i will discuss in details.

On the first hand, share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world with others will help them alot in different ways of their life.For instance, scientific research will assist them to think about the findings and also developed the new ideas to enhance this research.Additonally, knowlege about the business will hepls a person to understand the requirements and key responsiblites to start a new business.Moreover, in the academic field encourges students to develope new ideas and learn modern skills that will provide them a better carer in the future.

Secondly, Some information is too important or too valuable.For example, the scientific research on a technology that is helpful for a country to update it's security and military will have security concern in the future.Therefore, it should not be shared with other countries.On the other hand, business and academic related information can be shared by some cost.For instance, lots of orgnaizations and acadmies are teaching people by charging the fee that is very grateful for thier startup or choose a carer in their upcoming life.

In concluion, share as much information as possible in scientific research, with others will help them alot in different ways of their life but it has some security concern.But business and the academic information can be provide without any charge or by profession.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You discuss both views and state a position, but “I strongly agreed with both statements” does not make your own judgement clear, and the conclusion does not resolve this tension. The examples are relevant: you explain that sharing research can generate ideas, while military technology may raise security concerns. However, the business and academic discussion shifts to charging fees, which is not quite the same as whether valuable information should be shared freely, and this point is not developed. The response contains 234 words, so it is 16 words below the required minimum; this limits the space available to explain and support your ideas. Develop a consistent opinion and connect each example directly to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the first hand,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” helps readers identify the stages of your discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the point about charging for business and academic information does not clearly explain whether it should be shared freely. Some linking phrases are repetitive or awkward, and the conclusion repeats earlier points rather than bringing the two views together. Use clearer topic sentences and explain how each example supports the paragraph’s main claim; this would make the organisation more coherent and less dependent on formulaic transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “scientific research,” “findings,” “security concern,” and “military,” which helps communicate the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make the writing less clear or natural, such as “higly controversial,” “knowlege,” “key responsiblites,” and “choose a carer.” Phrases such as “grateful for their startup” do not express the intended meaning clearly. Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms for the central issue—such as access, confidentiality, intellectual property, or commercial value—would help you discuss the topic with greater clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentences, for example the sentence beginning “For instance, scientific research will assist them,” and you use basic connectors to relate ideas. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make parts of the response difficult to read. Examples include “the topic … is became,” “share … will help,” and “business and the academic information can be provide,” where verb forms and sentence construction are faulty. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and punctuation, including missing spaces after full stops. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses while checking verb forms and sentence boundaries.

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