Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is often debated whether information across scientific reserch, business and academic world should be shared as openly as possible, or if certain date is too private or valuable to be open freely. While there are valid perspectives for protecting knowladge , i believe that both colaborated together yields greate long-term benefits for most of the topic.

On the other hand, there are various reasons why some informations should be kept confidential.the pivortal reason is connected to competative advantage and privacy protection. In business world, companies invest financial resources into reserch and development to create unique products . So if competators could access these freely , businesses would lose their market advantage and icentive to innovate. Furthermore , sometimes the information is that improtant that it cannot be released openly , for national security and publick

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the central debate and begin to explain why businesses may protect information, linking investment in research and development to competitive advantage and innovation. However, the response addresses the task only minimally: it does not develop the case for sharing information, give a clear, complete personal position, or provide a relevant example. The final point about national security is cut off, so its reasoning cannot be assessed. The response also falls short of the required minimum length, leaving the discussion substantially incomplete. To improve, present both views in separate, developed paragraphs, explain your own position directly, and support each main point with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an identifiable opening that introduces the debate, followed by a paragraph beginning “On the other hand” that signals a contrasting view. This gives the reader some basic direction. However, the response ends mid-sentence, and there is no developed progression to the view in favour of sharing or to a conclusion. Connections between ideas are limited, while punctuation around transitions is inconsistent—for example, “confidential.the” runs two sentences together. Organise the essay into a complete introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Use linking phrases to show how each reason supports the paragraph’s main point, rather than relying on a transition alone.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “confidential,” “competitive advantage,” “research and development,” and “market advantage.” These choices show an effort to discuss business and information protection rather than relying entirely on general language. However, spelling and word-form errors are frequent and sometimes make the reader pause: examples include “reserch,” “knowladge,” “colaborated,” and “competators.” Some phrases are also imprecise, such as “date is too private” and “both colaborated together yields.” Proofread carefully and choose accurate collocations; for instance, refer to “data” or “information,” and describe the two approaches as “both views” or “a balance between openness and protection.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both a complex opening sentence with “whether … or if” and a reason-and-result structure beginning “So if competitors could access these freely.” This shows some willingness to use more than simple sentences. However, control is uneven, and errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation can make parts difficult to follow. For example, “both collaborated together yields” has an unclear subject and verb agreement, while “In business world” is missing an article. The final sentence is incomplete, ending with “publick” without a completed clause. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, check singular and plural agreement, and review articles and sentence boundaries before submitting.

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