Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Presently, businesses main focus in the advertisements are that their products are enhanced and new in some way. In this era, where technological advancements are on presedence, so does the competetion in this market at its peak. This has significantly changed the buying behaviour along with social media where the users give there feedback for the products they used. In my opinion it is a positive development which provides the customers to have more advanced products and get new experience.

Firstly, the world where we are living today has become the hub of advanced technology. This can be seen clearly in our lifes which have provided humans with all the luxuries, making every manual work to be done automatically through machines. For example, the people used to wash cloths manually by hands but now there are automatic washing machine doing everything by itself people just need to put there cloths in it. Hence, due to this businesses are focusing on developing new products and majorly focusing these changes in there advertisements, so that people get to know the new development of their product.

Secondly, as the competition has increased the businesses are heavily focusing on delevloping new products. Increase in the competetion the customer buying behaviour has also been modified because of high usage of mobile phones and spending most of the time on social media and giving reviews about the product increases the popularity of the businesses which results in high number of sales. Seeing this the companies are focusing more on their advertisements and showing how they differ from their competitor.

In conclusion, the companies are highly emphasising about their products new enhanced features in their advertisements, so that they can compete and get higher sales than their competitors along with giving new features in their products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: you explain why businesses highlight new features, citing technological progress, competition and social-media reviews, and you clearly state that you see this as positive. The washing-machine example helps illustrate how innovation can benefit consumers. However, the reasons are not developed equally: the first paragraph explains technological change, while the competition and social-media point is less clearly connected to why advertising stresses novelty. Your positive judgement is also asserted more than explored; explain more directly how customers benefit, and acknowledge a possible drawback such as exaggerated claims or pressure to replace usable products. This would make the response more fully supported and balanced in its explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. “Firstly,” “Secondly” and “In conclusion” make the main stages easy to follow, and each body paragraph has a central topic. However, progression within some sentences is less clear. For example, the sentence beginning “Increase in the competition…” combines competition, buying behaviour, mobile-phone use, reviews and sales without showing the links between them precisely. The conclusion largely repeats the introduction rather than drawing the reasons together. Use clearer links between cause and effect, and make pronoun references explicit—for instance, specify what “these changes” refers to. This would make cohesion less mechanical and the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary, including “technological advancements,” “buying behaviour,” “competition” and “enhanced features,” which allows you to discuss the topic. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “automatic washing machine” and “social media.” However, inaccurate spelling and word choice are noticeable, including “presedence,” “competetion,” “delevloping” and “there” where “their” is intended. Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “competition in this market at its peak” and “new experience.” These do not prevent the reader from understanding the main ideas, but they reduce precision and fluency. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations, such as “intense market competition” and “offer consumers a new experience.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “where,” “because” and “so that.” The overall meaning is generally clear, but some errors in agreement, sentence construction and articles remain. For example, “businesses main focus … are” has a mismatch between the singular subject “focus” and the verb “are,” while “there are automatic washing machine” needs a plural noun or a different construction. The opening sentence of the second body paragraph, “Increase in the competition the customer buying behaviour…,” is not grammatically complete. Review subject–verb agreement and build long sentences around one clear main clause; splitting the social-media sentence would also improve control.

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