Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In current age of consumerism, and mass production, businesses nowadays usually focus more on marketing their products as revolutionary in some way, because of the product and market saturation. In my opinion, it is a negative development since it puts a burden on industries to produce goods that are not necessity of the time.
One of the main reason behind this trend is market saturation. Almost every industry offers a wide range of products, making it increasingly difficult for businesses to stand out. As a result, comapnies frequently modify existing products, introduce minor changes and use marketing strategies to present them as something not seen before.
Although this strategy benefits busninesses financially, It can have multiple negative effects on the environment and the society. For instance, in many cases mass produced products are bought impulsively, due to micro trends and heavy social media campaigns, which attracts people to buy things they donnot need. They ultimately end up in landfils, which altogether creates a huge pressure on natural ecosystem, since a lot of those products are made out of synthetic material that requres decades to decompose. One of the prime example of this is fashion industry, consumers often buy new trending fashion accesories or outfits almost every month, that are worn only once or twice and subsequently end up in a waste pile, products like sweaters made out of polyester and accessories out of plastic take thousands of years to decompose which affects natural ecosystem. Moreover, producing same designs and selling them just by using different packing and aggressive marketing only encourages the over consumption mindset, and the never ending cycle keeps happening.
In conclusion, we need to be mindful of our shopping habbits, and companies need to provide sustainable alternative instead of producing same goods that already exist in the market. That way they do not promote over consumption and audiance does not spend on same trends over and over again.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
Your response addresses both parts of the question: you explain that market saturation encourages companies to present modified products as new, and you clearly judge this trend negatively. The discussion of impulsive purchases, waste and the fashion industry gives relevant support, especially the example of clothing worn only once or twice. This meets the task well, but the explanation of why businesses emphasise novelty could be developed further—for example, by explaining how novelty attracts attention, differentiates a brand or increases sales. Some environmental claims, such as the time polyester takes to decompose, are asserted rather than carefully connected to the central argument. Extending the business-side explanation and making the example more precise would make the response more fully developed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your position, the body paragraphs explain the trend and its effects, and the conclusion offers a recommendation. The progression from market saturation to consumer behaviour and environmental consequences is generally easy to follow. You also use linking expressions such as “As a result,” “For instance,” and “Moreover” to show relationships between ideas. At times, however, the long body paragraph combines several points—social-media influence, landfill waste, fashion and overconsumption—without enough separation, so the central line of reasoning becomes less clear. Some links, such as “which altogether creates,” are awkward, and “That way” in the conclusion has an unclear reference. Grouping related points and using more precise referencing would improve cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “market saturation,” “impulsively,” “synthetic material,” “aggressive marketing” and “overconsumption.” These choices help communicate the argument and show attempts to use less common language. However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or imprecise: “products that are not necessity of the time” does not express your intended meaning naturally, and “a waste pile” is less suitable than a term such as “landfill” or “waste site.” There are also spelling errors, including “comapnies,” “landfils,” “requres” and “habbits.” These do not prevent understanding, but proofreading and checking collocations would make your vocabulary more controlled and precise.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including a reason clause with “because,” a result clause beginning “which,” and a contrast introduced by “Although.” Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “One of the main reason” needs plural agreement, while “which attracts people” does not agree with the plural subject “micro trends and heavy social media campaigns.” The sentence beginning “One of the prime example” also has a singular/plural mismatch and becomes difficult to manage as it continues through several clauses. Capitalisation is inconsistent in “It can,” and commas sometimes join or separate clauses awkwardly. Check agreement, articles and sentence boundaries, and divide long sentences where needed.
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