Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Several companies often try to depict that their product has a new feature which makes it superior to its competitors, becuase markets are oversaturated with similar products and businesses believe that showing that their product has something new will help improve sales. I believe this is a negative development, and corporations should focus on solving the issues in their current product and improve other departments like after sales services to provide an overall satisfactory experience to the citizens.

One major development over the recent years is how accessible every product is to the public. Because of online advertisement and shopping, many similar products are popping up in people's feeds from which they have to choose. A lot of customers are facing the dilemma of choosing from multiple products providing the same services. Companies believe that presenting their product as new compared to others can help them win over consumers and increase their sales. For example, some washing machine companies are offering AI features in their products due to increasing AI popularity. AI might be irrelevant for a washing machine, but companies believe it will convince people to buy their product.

Instead of resorting to these types of tactics, companies should take feedback from users on their products and try to improve on the existing issues. Also, there are many other areas which play significant role in the sales of a product. Customers look into things like the company's after sales service department and spare parts availability as well. Company should ensure that all the departments which interact with the consumer during a product's life cycle are up to the mark. For example, a big automative maker in our country doesn't make good sales on its cars, not because of the quality of its products, but due to bad customer service.

In conclusion, instead of trying to add one new advancement to the product in order to gain an edge over competitors, organisations should focus on fixing previous issues in their product and improvements in other supporting departments.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall7.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your response addresses both parts of the question: you explain that businesses highlight novelty to stand out in crowded markets and state clearly that you see this as negative. The washing-machine example supports your explanation, while the car-maker example illustrates your view that customer service can matter more than new features. Your position remains consistent in the conclusion. To strengthen the response further, develop the reasoning behind the negative judgement more explicitly: for instance, explain how promoting features that may be irrelevant can mislead buyers, waste resources, or distract from product reliability. The recommendation to improve existing products and support services is relevant, but its benefits could be explained in more depth rather than mainly listed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay has a clear overall progression: an introduction presents the explanation and position, the first body paragraph discusses why businesses promote novelty, the second develops your alternative priorities, and the conclusion restates your view. Linking phrases such as “For example,” “Instead of,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the argument, and the examples are placed appropriately. To make the organisation more flexible and cohesive, connect some claims more explicitly. For example, after noting that AI may be irrelevant in a washing machine, explain directly how this illustrates the limits of novelty-led advertising. The second body paragraph also moves from feedback to after-sales service and spare parts; a clearer sentence showing how these points support the same central argument would improve the progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a suitable range of topic vocabulary, including “oversaturated,” “after sales services,” “spare parts availability,” and “product’s life cycle.” These choices help convey the business context, and the meaning is generally clear. There are, however, some imprecise or unnatural expressions that limit flexibility and collocational control. “Depict that their product has a new feature” is not a natural way to describe advertising a feature; “promote” or “emphasise” would fit better. “Automative maker” is an inaccurate word form, and “up to the mark” is less formal than the surrounding style. Check spelling as well, including “becuase.” More precise, consistently formal phrasing would make the argument sound more assured.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex structures, including a reason clause in the opening and the contrastive construction “not because … but due to …” in the car example. Most sentences communicate their meaning clearly, but some grammatical errors remain. In “areas which play significant role,” the singular count noun needs an article (“a significant role”); “Company should ensure” also needs a determiner or plural form (“The company” or “Companies”). In “try to improve on the existing issues,” the structure is awkward; use “address existing issues” to avoid the problem. The opening sentence is long and contains several linked ideas, so dividing it would improve control. Greater accuracy with articles and sentence boundaries, alongside the complex structures already attempted, would strengthen this criterion.

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