Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some people begin start the new business like about perfoum then people first is in mind we advertising our products then we sale in markets.

One the side we look if you have makes new products you don't make shop in amrkets then you sale online. Then its good option first you makes good product and one here famous person you give him good pay then advertise our products.

On the look other side if you have good brand product you don't to advertising because you have shop in the markets. Because our all day people coming and markets so your products is good quailty then everyone buy without advertising.

Now i am giving example in relevant on my city. Now days everyone is foo vloggar and vloggar needs money then its products advertise. Few days ago one students makes a biryani shops and these students biryani very tasty and good for local person. So remember someone advertise your biryani shop then people taste your shops more run your shop. So he deal with food vloggar then he advertise the shop and tell the shop where its located then next people come ti his shops and buying the biryani because the student biryani giving good taste so everyone buying and enjoy.

If overall we look if you make you good product then you don't need to advertising or don't need to good loctaion and if get some time then next time your work good runing and wanna look how to improve our work.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You make an attempt to discuss both why businesses promote products as new and whether this is positive or negative, and the local biryani-shop example is relevant to advertising through a food vlogger. However, the response does not clearly explain why businesses generally emphasise novelty, and your position on whether this is positive or negative remains difficult to identify. The points about a good product not needing advertising and about using a famous person are introduced but not explained or connected into a clear argument. The example gives some support to the idea that promotion can attract customers, but it does not establish your overall view. To strengthen the response, state your position directly and develop each main reason with a clear explanation and a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response is divided into paragraphs, and phrases such as “On the other side” and “Now i am giving example” show an effort to guide the reader. The biryani-shop example also provides a recognisable sequence: a vlogger advertises the shop, and customers visit. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the opening is unclear and the discussion shifts between online sales, established brands, product quality, and the example without showing how these points relate. Some linking phrases are inaccurate or repetitive, and references such as “these students” and “his shops” make it hard to track who or what is meant. Organise the essay around a clear position, with one paragraph explaining why businesses stress novelty and another evaluating the effects, using clear links between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “advertise,” “products,” “brand,” “quality,” and “food vlogger,” and the local example shows an attempt to describe a real marketing method. However, the range is basic and several word choices or forms make meaning unclear, such as “begin start the new business,” “famous person,” and “your shop more run.” Spelling errors, including “perfoum,” “quailty,” and “loctaion,” also reduce clarity. Try to use more precise business and advertising language, and check spelling and collocations. For example, describe a company as “launching a new product,” explain that it “promotes its latest features,” or say that an advertisement “attracts customers.” This would make your ideas more exact and less repetitive.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to form longer sentences and use conditional patterns, for example, “if you have good brand product you don't to advertising,” as well as a sequence of events in the vlogger example. However, sentence structures are very limited in control, and frequent errors in verb forms, articles, agreement, and sentence construction make several ideas difficult to understand. Examples include “you sale in markets,” “one students makes,” and “everyone buying and enjoy.” Some sentences also combine several ideas without clear grammatical boundaries. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then connect them with controlled clauses. For instance: “If a company launches a new product, it may advertise online” and “The vlogger told viewers where the shop was, so more customers visited.”

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