Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
It is undeniable that in this modern world, technology is rising its wings all over the world. In this regard, in their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way. This essay will discuss not reasons for this but also benefits which will be outlined in forthcoming fragments with logical conclusion. In my view, it is a positive development.
To commence with, there are many reasons for this given notion. The first and foremost is due to attract large number of customers. To explain, people are getting so influenced with latest products of food and electronics. They are engaged in the buying products which are represented in the different ways so businesses are nowadays representing products in another ways to attract large number of customers. For instance, chocolate company represents the chocolate in advertisements in new ways to attract large number of customers. Secondly, to show products in an innovative way. To elaborate, businesses are increasing their sales by advertising their products and in advertisements they show products in a different look and in innovative way.
However, there are also several advantages of advertising products. The prime one is innovation and awareness. To clarify, it is a positive development as it creates awareness among society of products, companies provide genuine information of products in advertisements and it pushes companies to improve offerings and provide information about their products to make more purchasing decisions for consumers.
To conclude, although their various reasons of emphasizing products in some way such as to attract customers and to show item in a innovative way. Yet pros cannot be neglected at any cost.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for emphasizing 'newness' and the opinion on whether this is positive or negative. However, the development of ideas is limited. The reasons provided, such as 'attracting customers' and 'innovation', are somewhat repetitive and lack depth. The example of a 'chocolate company' is too vague to effectively support the argument. While a position is clear, the essay would benefit from more specific, real-world examples or deeper analysis of the psychological impact of advertising on consumers to reach a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices like 'To commence with', 'Firstly', and 'However'. However, the flow is sometimes mechanical, and the transition between ideas feels repetitive. For instance, the phrase 'to attract large number of customers' is used multiple times within the same paragraph, which hinders the smooth progression of ideas. Additionally, the concluding paragraph is quite brief and does not effectively synthesize the arguments presented in the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There is significant repetition of basic terms like 'products', 'advertisements', and 'customers'. Some collocations are unnatural, such as 'rising its wings' and 'make more purchasing decisions'. To improve, you should aim to use a wider variety of synonyms and more sophisticated academic vocabulary to express your ideas with greater precision and nuance.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'This essay will discuss not reasons for this but also benefits' (incorrect correlative conjunction usage) and 'people are getting so influenced with latest products' (missing articles and preposition errors). While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors suggests a need for more careful proofreading and a better grasp of article usage and sentence construction.
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