Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Intro Companies are showing there products are much better than others, in the form of advertisement. The reasons are behind this is increasing the sales competition. I think this is negative development. As this will disturb everyone's budget.

There is enough proof to show that advertising businesses in present days increased the sales of products. Increasing sales competition is one of the primary reason. Moreover, advertisement create a sense of urgency in individuals, so they can purchased those products quickly.

Increasing sales competition is one of the primary positive development, and individuals have more options in one particular thing. People have option where they want cheap or expensive products.

one of the primary reason behind negative development in advertising business is they will disturb everyone's budget. For example, last year when I saw one advertisment about one million perfume on L.C.D. My husband says he saw and heard about that perfume and he wanted when we bought that perfume our budget get disturb. we face a lot of problems because that perfume was way more expensive than we thought.

To conclusion, Advertisments about products or things have more negative points than positive ; so that this negative development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt but fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the writer identifies reasons for advertising and takes a clear position, the arguments are underdeveloped and lack sufficient depth. The example provided regarding the perfume is personal and relevant, but the overall analysis remains superficial. To improve, you must expand on your points with more detailed explanations and broader examples to meet the length requirement and demonstrate a more thorough exploration of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes mechanical (e.g., 'Moreover', 'To conclusion'). The progression of ideas is occasionally disjointed, particularly in the transition between the discussion of competition and the personal example. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the phrase 'one million perfume', which lacks context. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would enhance the flow and logical progression of your arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, which limits the ability to convey complex ideas. There are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'advertisement create a sense of urgency' (should be 'creates') and 'when we bought that perfume our budget get disturb' (should be 'was disturbed'). The range of vocabulary is narrow, relying on simple terms like 'good', 'cheap', and 'expensive'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more precise, topic-specific vocabulary related to marketing and consumer behavior.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'advertisement create'), tense consistency (e.g., 'he wanted when we bought'), and article usage. The sentence structures are predominantly simple, with limited attempts at complex sentences. When complex structures are attempted, they often contain errors, such as 'The reasons are behind this is increasing the sales competition'. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like verb tense and pluralization will help improve your accuracy.

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