Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In this modern era, business is the most wanted things every one want to do .In addition ,everybody want to represent their business in new way and advertising is one of the best way . Business owner do different type for advertisement for that customer become more interested.In this essay ,I will discuss positive and negative development and then i will give my opinion.
Firstly,public demand is the major thing for a business and they must need to thing some unique idea for advertising . Some changes in product business can shine and get some publicity . This is the positive symbol for a business owner . For example , buying product from shein and centrella is the best deal for customer because of their advertisement .As a result, public always trust where they attract more.
However, there have some negative issue as like ,people see many advertisement that company clothes are so good .Moreover,they gonna by this then they understand that product they buy because they insprier from advertisement is not so good . The materials also so bad and not comfortable at all ,so sometimes it can be negative because of this things.As a result , business owner always need to aware about their product quality and people also need to aware that advertisement always not represent the exact quality about the product.
In conclusion, In my opinion it has negative development more then positive because people cannot understand the quality or quantity .Sometimes for that people maybe suffering after buying any thing .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: why businesses emphasize newness and whether this is positive or negative. However, the development of ideas is limited. The explanation for why businesses use this strategy is somewhat superficial, and the discussion of the negative aspects relies on a single example regarding product quality. The position is clear, but the arguments lack depth and specific supporting evidence, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. To improve, you should expand on the psychological impact of 'newness' on consumers and provide more nuanced examples beyond simple product quality issues.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'As a result' used twice in close proximity and 'However, there have some negative issue as like'. The flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed, making the progression of ideas feel repetitive. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the prompt, rather than relying on simple transitions.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, often relying on simple terms like 'good', 'bad', and 'things'. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'business is the most wanted things' and 'they gonna by this'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas with precision. To achieve a higher score, you should work on using more academic collocations and synonyms to avoid repetition and improve the sophistication of your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('everybody want', 'business owner do'), incorrect verb tenses, and punctuation errors. Sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited attempts at complex sentences, and those that are attempted often contain errors (e.g., 'they understand that product they buy because they insprier from advertisement is not so good'). These errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve your clarity.
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