Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Personally I think that there are different reasons why businesses choose to adopt this kind of advertising strategy and that are due to various factors. First of all there is the savage competition between similar brands: companies are constantly looking for new strategies to get a bigger slice of customers and to obtain greater earnings.

While brands are trying to highlight differences and changes in their products, the reality is that these are all at the same level of progress and there are not significant advantages by choosing one instead of another: their aim is to convince people to feel differences that, often, are not even real. This aspect is closely link with the second reason that lead this phenomenon that is the need of the people to own the best objects that markets could offer.

Moreover people are lead to believe that even a small improvement in a technological field, for example, could be able to radically change their life even if, as in reality happens, it is just an useless expence influenced by their emotions.

Personally I believe that this development has substancial negative consequences: although some times businneses are really bringing something new or innovative on the market, in the majority of the cases are just trying to convince and persuade people to spend their money, sometimes more than they can afford.

Furthermore, this strategy has a huge impact on the environment because lead the production of new numerous objects with short life expectance.

In conclusion I believe that this kind of advertising campaign is more harmful than we believe and quite unethical but, unfortunately, destined to last for long.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all parts of the prompt, providing reasons for the advertising trend and clearly stating your position that it is a negative development. Your ideas, such as the impact of competition and environmental concerns, are relevant. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited. For instance, the discussion on environmental impact is brief and could have been expanded with specific examples of 'planned obsolescence' to reach a higher band. The position is clear throughout, but the essay would benefit from more detailed supporting evidence to fully explore the implications of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'First of all', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore' to link your ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions are slightly awkward, such as 'This aspect is closely link with the second reason that lead this phenomenon'. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs could be improved by ensuring each sentence builds more fluidly upon the previous one to enhance the overall progression of your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'savage competition', 'innovative', and 'unethical'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and minor errors, such as 'useless expence' (spelling: expense), 'lead this phenomenon' (should be 'leads to'), and 'substancial' (spelling: substantial). While your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band. To improve, focus on correct collocations and ensuring that your word choices are consistently accurate in a formal context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this level. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('reasons... that are due to', 'people are lead to believe'), spelling errors ('expence', 'businneses'), and awkward phrasing ('as in reality happens'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and verb forms would significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.

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