Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

These days all over the continents, advertising companies have a tuff compete among them, as there are many new technology and exclusive ideas or thoughts among them even creativity plays a big role in sales.

In modern times, advertising plays a crucial role in every business as, if a product is launched in the market. Advertising is the one which helps to sale the product as, it tells pros and cons of the particular product and how it is more effective then other. Even over the billboards and posters creativity play all the role in the sale game. Example- Butterflow is a pen company which introduced there product in 2013, when Hauser and Octane where leading the market but due to his creative idea kids switch to butterflow as they know about their target audience.

Although, there are some negative or impact which is related to it as, many products have good efficiency to grow but , due to negative or bad advertising it got stuck and put the business in loss such as- Denver it was a perfume company, it had a quite good smell and it was long lasting then other product in the market, but the sales creative team does not work on the advertising material. When other product enter the product such as Nivea and Wild stone they got spotlight in the market.

In my opinion, all the company are aware of that how important is to advertise there product and in a correct way and somehow it is important as, there is a lot of companion in the market so, it can sale their product more charmingly and attractively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: why businesses emphasize newness and whether this is positive or negative. However, the development is inconsistent. While you provide examples like Butterflow and Denver, the explanation of why businesses focus on 'newness' is somewhat superficial, relying on general statements about competition rather than exploring the psychological or strategic reasons behind product innovation. The position is clear, but the argument could be more nuanced. To improve, ensure that your supporting points directly link back to the prompt's focus on 'newness' rather than just general advertising effectiveness.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, the transition 'Although, there are some negative or impact which is related to it as' is grammatically awkward and confusing. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the use of 'it' without a clear antecedent. The logical progression between sentences is occasionally interrupted by these structural issues, making the flow feel somewhat disjointed. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'good', 'bad', and 'big', and there are several instances of incorrect word choice or collocation, such as 'tuff compete' (tough competition) and 'sale the product' (sell the product). Some phrases are repetitive, and the attempt to use more sophisticated vocabulary is hindered by spelling errors and misuse. To reach a higher band, focus on learning collocations and using more precise academic vocabulary to express your ideas.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('creativity play'), incorrect verb forms ('sale' instead of 'sell'), and punctuation errors. There are also several awkward phrasings, such as 'when other product enter the product'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence construction prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and word forms would be highly beneficial.

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