Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern era, multiple people are reading newspaper on online platforms such as mobile apps. In present time, businesses usually emphasise that their products in the newspapers. There are several reasons such it is increase sales and customer more attract. although, it is positive development such as encourages innovation and better technology.

Commencing with the reasons why multiple businesses emphasise their product in the newspapers is that it is best way to create customer attraction. People are interested in new products and may want to try the latest version. Another reason is that it is rise sales. New and improved products can encourage people to replace older products. Moreover, technology changes quickly ,New features can genuinely make products more useful. To cite an instance, in the UK multiple people who are presenting their new products such as clothes, furniture, and many more.

There are several positive development which can be considered. Firstly, multiple individuals encourage innovation and better technology. To explain, when businesses emphasise that their products are new or improved, they are encouraged to develop better technology and features. This can make products more useful, efficient, and convenient for customers. For example, smartphone companies regularly introduce new new models with better cameras, longer battery life, and faster processors. This competition motivates companies to continue improving their products.

in conclusion, there are some reasons why businesses emphasise their products in the new because it is better way to create more customer attraction. Although, there are some positive side such as good technology and innovation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for the emphasis on 'new' products and providing an opinion on whether this is positive. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments regarding why businesses use this strategy are somewhat repetitive, focusing mainly on 'customer attraction' and 'sales'. The discussion on whether it is a positive development is also brief and lacks depth. To reach a higher band, you should provide more nuanced examples and explore the potential negative aspects, such as consumerism or planned obsolescence, to create a more balanced and thorough argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'although, it is positive development' is used incorrectly as a transition. There are also issues with referencing; the connection between the introduction and the body paragraphs is weak. Some sentences feel disjointed, and the flow between ideas is often interrupted by grammatical errors. Improving the use of linking words like 'consequently', 'furthermore', or 'in contrast' would help create a smoother progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You frequently use basic phrases such as 'multiple people', 'new products', and 'better technology'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'it is rise sales' instead of 'it increases sales' and 'customer more attract' instead of 'attracts more customers'. To improve, you should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary related to business and marketing, and focus on using words in their correct grammatical form. Avoid repeating the same simple adjectives and verbs throughout the essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'multiple people are reading newspaper'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack necessary components, such as 'There are several reasons such it is increase sales'. While there is an attempt to use complex sentences, these are often poorly constructed and contain errors. You need to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that prepositions and articles are used correctly before attempting more complex structures.

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