Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays businesses usually emphasise that their product should new in some ways for advertising and I think it is a positive development if they was true to their customer.

Because advertising plays crucial role in the development of the product or businesses especially in the contemporary society in which everyone wants something new to buy ,to use and reliable . For example in the modern world if there is increase in the junk food but on the other hand population also preferred to be fit because it enhanced their overall appearance and for this they preferred to look good , to clean healthy diet and also go to the gym and all

If business show that they product contain healthy vitamins and minerals plus they are sale in the small pouch and mix with any meal at a reasonable price then this advertisement creates a positive development . For instance the product called good monk and they developed positively by advertising through the shark tank and tell the public about the new things which are available and the customer are keen to buy the product .

Nevertheless on the contrast if the business make a false accusation in advertising for development then it it progress for some period of time but it can lead to negative development for a long term because they play with the public trust .

Conclusion that government should make a scheme that only true advertising is shown to the public about business so that there should be no fraud happened and customers should also be aware and get a full knowledge before investing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: why businesses emphasize 'newness' and whether this is positive or negative. However, the development of ideas is limited. The explanation for why businesses emphasize newness is somewhat vague, focusing on consumer desire without fully exploring the strategic marketing aspect. The example of 'Good Monk' is relevant but lacks sufficient detail to fully support the argument. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments are underdeveloped and rely on repetitive phrasing. To improve, you should provide more nuanced reasons for the 'newness' trend, such as competitive advantage or planned obsolescence, and ensure your examples are more clearly linked to your main points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow is often disrupted by awkward transitions and sentence structure. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices like 'Nevertheless' and 'For instance', they are sometimes used incorrectly or placed awkwardly. The progression of ideas within paragraphs is disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the transition from general advertising to the health/gym example is abrupt. Paragraphing is present but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks cohesion, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument smoothly. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly enhance the coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'new', 'good', and 'development' repeatedly. There are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'if they was true to their customer' (should be 'were') and 'make a false accusation' (which is not the standard collocation for misleading advertising). To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise, topic-specific vocabulary related to marketing and consumer behavior, such as 'innovation', 'market saturation', 'deceptive practices', or 'consumer trust'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('if they was true'), article usage ('the product called good monk'), and awkward phrasing ('if the business make a false accusation'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing commas and run-on sentences. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar limits the score. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring correct tense usage would help improve your accuracy.

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