Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In their advertising, businesses in the present era emphasise that their products are novel in some way. I personally think that it is a negative development. This essay discusses both the views.

Primarily, people purchase products influenced by advertisements. Businesses spend huge sum of money on advertising their products. They also promote their products through famous celebrities which attracts consumers. This in a way is a positive development for businesses as it helps them to increase their sales of the product. Most of these advertisements are false showcasing their product is new in a certain way.

Meanwhile, customers who purchase the product are at negative as the products may be effective or may not. Consumers are betrayed by showing that the product is new and works best compared with other products in the market. Due to advertisements customers are at risk this is a negative development. Marketing the product by promising effective results and novelty is wrong. This leads to trust issues among the consumers due to which they might never buy products from their business. In many advertisements it shows that the product is very effective and there are exclusive offers on the product whereas in reality there is not such offer. Consumers are at risk in such cases.

In conclusion, advertising is a positive development for businesses. Meanwhile for consumers it is a negative development as they are betrayed. Hence businesses must be transparent and honest while marketing their product. This help building trust among consumers and increase their sales.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, identifying why businesses emphasize novelty and providing an opinion on whether this is positive or negative. However, the development is somewhat limited. While you mention that businesses use celebrities and false claims to increase sales, the explanation remains superficial. The argument regarding the negative impact on consumers is repetitive, focusing primarily on 'betrayal' and 'trust issues' without exploring broader economic or societal implications. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples or nuanced reasoning to support your claims, rather than repeating the same points in different ways.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For example, the transition 'Meanwhile' is used twice in close proximity, and the connection between ideas within paragraphs is sometimes abrupt. The introduction states that the essay will discuss 'both the views,' but the body paragraphs do not clearly delineate the 'why' and the 'positive/negative' aspects as effectively as they could. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring a smoother flow between sentences would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'huge sum of money,' 'new,' and 'wrong.' There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'customers who purchase the product are at negative' and 'there is not such offer.' To improve, you should aim to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to marketing and consumer behavior, such as 'deceptive advertising,' 'brand loyalty,' or 'market saturation,' and ensure that your word choices are grammatically and contextually accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'This help building trust' (should be 'helps build'), 'there is not such offer' (should be 'there is no such offer'), and 'the products may be effective or may not' (should be 'may or may not be effective'). While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors—particularly with subject-verb agreement and article usage—prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would be a very effective way to improve your score.

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