Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Businesses advertising nowadays are usually emphasising that their product is unique or new in some way, this development maybe positive or negative.

Nowadays consumers mindset requires modern product, products which are unique or new, for this i have a perfect example "car" every company says their car is new or unique in some way, but most of the time very tiny difference is in realty, some companies only do some face lifts and may add a body kit and the advertise their product as new and better then ever, infact customers are getting no newer value due to it.

Advertising this way that the our product is new and in reality the product is not new in any way, this result in bad image for the brand and the for the product itself, and many times we saw in the past that such companies loses their goodwill from customers

Another example is "Iphones" every year apple upgrades their battery life so the phone can last longer, they improve charging time so the customers can charge their phones quickly, the camera upgrade, in recent years apple upgraded it cameras from 12 mega pixels to 48 mega pixels, this new upgrade was relly been beneficial for content creators and through these influencers apple get free advertisement every year. Apple advertise their phones this way and it is usually taken in positive terms by apple fans through out in the world, moreover it proves Apple's integrity, honesty and quality of service towards their customers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: explaining why businesses emphasize 'newness' and providing an opinion on whether this is positive or negative. However, the development is uneven. The first body paragraph discusses the negative aspect (deceptive marketing), while the second focuses on a positive example (Apple). While the ideas are relevant, the argument lacks depth and a clear, consistent position. The introduction is quite brief and does not fully outline the essay's direction. To improve, ensure that your position is clearly stated in the introduction and maintained throughout, with more balanced and detailed supporting arguments for both sides of the issue.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow between ideas is often mechanical or disjointed. For example, the transition between the general discussion of cars and the specific example of iPhones is abrupt. There is a reliance on basic cohesive devices like 'another example is' and 'moreover,' but the internal structure of sentences is often fragmented, making it difficult to follow the logical progression of the argument. The use of punctuation is inconsistent, which further hinders the readability of the text. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but remains quite basic and repetitive. You use terms like 'new,' 'unique,' and 'product' frequently. While you attempt to use more specific vocabulary such as 'goodwill,' 'integrity,' and 'content creators,' there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'very tiny difference is in realty' and 'such companies loses their goodwill.' The spelling errors (e.g., 'relly,' 'Iphones') also detract from the overall quality. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider range of collocations and more precise academic vocabulary, while paying closer attention to spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'companies loses'), incorrect verb tenses, and run-on sentences where clauses are joined incorrectly with commas. Punctuation is a significant weakness, particularly the lack of proper sentence boundaries. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often faulty. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring that each sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practicing the correct use of commas and periods to avoid run-on sentences.

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