Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is undeniable that advertisements play a crucial role in todays words. In this regards, businesses nowadays often emphasise that their products are new in some way. This essay will be outlined not only the reasons but also the negative effects in forthcoming paragraphs, with a logical conclusion.
To commence with, there are several reasons of this notion. The prime one is that attract customers. To explain it, companies shows their discounts, new features, product price in their add. people will be affected by this. when people know about discount and new feature. They will buy it. For example, the Apple company always shows their price and new features in their add. It provoke people to by when they see it. secondly increase sales, To elaborate it, when individuals see a advertisement and know about it discounts and new features, the number of consumers will be increased. Everyone who see add about a product. he want to buy it. To clarifi it, the smart phones companies usually show the camera quality, its space and anouthe more reason. peopele affeced by this.
However, there are also many few detriment effect as well . The first and foremost it that wast money. To justify it, people spend to much money on to buy unnecessary thing. for an epitome, the Mesho often show discounts on every things and also de give online service . People mostly are attracted by their discounts and buy unnecessary things. furthermore, new always not better. when companies show new in their advertisement. They only show new. but not tell abouts it is better or not. To clarify it, the Ram mini cooler company, show their new features. such as, their cooler is charge able, easy to carry, and give lighting facilities . but not tell that it is smaller than others. It not give proper air. That is necessary.
To conclude , although there are several reasons of this notion such as increase sales and attract customers.yet its negative effects can never be neglected at any cost.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for emphasizing 'newness' and the evaluation of whether this is positive or negative. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you provide examples like Apple and Meesho, the explanations are repetitive and lack depth. The position is clear, but the arguments could be more sophisticated to reach a higher band. The essay structure is present, but the analysis of the 'negative' aspect is slightly underdeveloped compared to the reasons for the trend.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate (e.g., 'To commence with', 'To elaborate it', 'for an epitome'). There are instances where the flow between sentences is disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where short, choppy sentences hinder the logical progression of ideas. Referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult to track the subject matter across the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'new', 'buy', and 'show'. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'todays words' instead of 'today's world', 'add' instead of 'ad' or 'advertisement', and 'anouthe more reason'. These errors occasionally impede communication. To improve, you should focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring correct spelling of common terms related to marketing and consumer behavior.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement ('companies shows', 'he want to buy'), article usage, and sentence fragments. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty, which impacts clarity. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with frequent misuse of full stops and commas. The majority of sentences contain errors, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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