Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In contemporary societies, companies have been exaggerating the updates of thier goods in some ways. I think if brands are not careful, it can hurt them, thus means it is negative development. This essay will cover the resons why companies are doing this whether it is a positive thing to do or not.

One of the main resons why companies emphasize new features of the products is to attract customers more. Buyers tends to be attracted to products that have new updates than to those that do not. This can be positive and profitale for the business because if maore consumers are attracted, more will eventually lead to sales. For instance, if a mobile phone brand introduces a nwe camera, processor and 6000 mah battery health, its advertisement will then show off and emphasize what this smartphone can do with these features. Buyers will then be attracted and interested in purchasing it.

However, it is a different story if the business advertises its products's features and updates as new even though it is not. Because it can be seen that the brand is lying to thier purchasers. For instance- if a fruit juice brand might use a certain technology to process the real juice without destroying its nutrients. Even though it is not a technology, they might emphasize the newness of this technology.Eventually, the company will set a high for their juice. When customer finds that is the same technology that they use and they do not find any difference in their juice, customers might not trust their future advertisement campaigns.

In conclusion, emphazing a products's new feature can be seen as positive if the featuer is genuinely new. However, if it is not new, compnies will their bar high and might lose consumer trust.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The student addresses all parts of the task, discussing both why businesses emphasise new features and whether this is a positive or negative development. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. The reasons provided, such as attracting customers and building trust, are relevant, although the development of ideas occasionally lacks depth and clarity, particularly in the third paragraph where the fruit juice example becomes somewhat confusingly phrased. The student extends their ideas, but some points over-generalise or trail off in precision. For instance, the transition between discussing genuine innovations and misleading advertising could be sharper. Overall, the response meets the requirements for a Band 6.0 as it addresses all parts of the prompt with relevant ideas, even though some sections remain under-developed or unclear.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph-by-paragraph structure, including an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Information and ideas flow logically from explaining the reasons behind the advertising trend to evaluating its consequences. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical. For example, the transitional phrases used, such as 'This can be positive and profitale for the business because if maore consumers are attracted, more will eventually lead to sales,' exhibit awkward referencing and repetitive phrasing. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, but the logical progression within the paragraphs occasionally stumbles due to mechanical linking and minor referencing issues. Therefore, this performance aligns closely with the Band 6 descriptors for Coherence and Cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'contemporary societies,' 'advertisement campaigns,' and 'genuinely new.' However, there are notable spelling errors ('thier' instead of their, 'resons' instead of reasons, 'profitale' instead of profitable, 'maore' instead of more, 'nwe' instead of new, 'emphazing' instead of emphasising, 'compnies' instead of companies, 'featuer' instead of feature) and word-choice inaccuracies. Some expressions are overly simplistic or slightly unnatural, such as 'set a high for their juice.' Despite these errors, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning, and the communication is not significantly impeded. This sits comfortably within the Band 6 descriptor range for Lexical Resource.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing conditional structures and relative clauses (e.g., 'if brands are not careful, it can hurt them,' 'if a mobile phone brand introduces...'). However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, particularly involving subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'Buyers tends to be attracted,' 'even though it is not' (referring to features/technology as plural), and missing punctuation or awkward phrasing in conditional sentences ('When customer finds that is the same technology...'). While these errors are noticeable and persist throughout the text, they rarely impede overall communication. The command of grammar reflects a mix of correct simple and complex structures mixed with errors, warranting a Band 6 score.

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